Do you ever wonder what it's like?
To take a bite,
And have it travel down without a spike
Sent up to your brain
Wondering what, this time, will bring it so much pain?
I wonder what it's like
To have a meal,
And I mean real,
Where I can taste instead of feel
Each spoonful of my shame-filled oatmeal,
But instead I make a deal
Where I can eat as long as I seal
My mouth until I'm ready to keel
Over in order to keep my appeal.
Does she know what it's like
to turn down a date
in fear of what would be on her plate,
But at this rate
It wouldn't matter what she ate,
'Cause there's not one thing that doesn't make her hate
The fact that she has to sate
This body at its current weight.
I wonder what it's like
to wake up to a day
and not have the first thing I say
To myself be what can I do to stay
This way
And keep the hunger at bay
So I can try to delay
Any changes my body is desperately trying to make.
Do you know what it's like
To spend the whole day in knots
Because you caught
A glimpse of your arms in a shot
And now you're fraught
With disappointment cause you thought
That after all you fought
You ought
To have limbs that are nice and taught,
But they're not
So you cannot be hot,
In case you forgot,
That's the jackpot,
Got it?
Do you wonder what it's like
To be in a body of perfection
Because the woman inside faces the same dissection
Of her size and proportion
Which is always through distortion
Where her reflection receives no affection
Because under her detection
There's always a section
That is seen as a defection
Like an obsessive inspection of her midsection
Which needs correction
So this results in rejection
Of everything that she is.
So do we keep up this disconnection
When there's nothing but a collection of introspection
Which festers like infection
Until everyone else is just a projection
Of what we think they are?
Objection.
I know you wonder what she's like The one you follow on your phone
Whose Instagram you flip through when you're alone
Where every other picture is of some gourmet scone or ice cream cones
Yet the rest show off her protruding hip bones
But there's no way to have known
The things that happen in between what is shown
What it means for her to hone
The person in those photos that make you want to postpone
Your next meal or atone
For the one you just ate on your own
Carefully planned to make sure your stomach hasn't grown
That is why I don't condone
Trying to make your life a clone
Of this unknown
That we have turned into our touchstone.
Do you wonder what it's like
To carry guilt with you for days
After an innocent and healthy graze
Turned into a blind and bloated craze
Which inevitably happens after you dodge and delay
Eating when you want or what you crave
So you're thinking about food 'til your head's in a daze
Staring at someone's meal while your eyes are glazed
Walking through a grocery store for what feels like days
Reading labels in a haze
Because your mind is ablaze
with fear.
So when I need a moment to be free
I turn on my TV
And there's a woman in a tight tee
In all her tiny glory
Just to remind me
That I should reflect what I see
But really, that isn't even her reality
Cause she
Has been forced to drop three Sizes as a fee
For wanting to be Successful in this industry
I mean country.
And I can guarantee That when she works out daily
It's not done with pure glee But mostly agony
While obsessing over a waist that is wee So she can look in the mirror and not feel crappy.
And that right there is the key
To the fitness game's monopoly People who want to flea
Their bodies.
Now, don't take this the wrong way please
But a man can be whatever size and shape he decrees
To some degree
Whereas all the ladies Must try to squeeze
Into the only mould that will appease The lens, but they should do it with ease
It should look like a breeze Not at all something that would cause a mental disease.
I mean geez
You should be able to eat a grilled cheese But also look skinny doing a sexy striptease
And if you can't then could we have another chick please?
With all of these impossible expertise That are actually nobody's.
Do you really think
This is the only female size
These carbon-copy slender thighs
Which we all treat like some sort of prize
Given to us by turning down fries
And excessive exercise
In an effort to hyper-metabolize
Where we're only energized by starvation highs
So I apologize
If you fantasize
Or minimize
Or normalize
Our compromise
But you should know that my thinness is not at all randomized
It is the most organized
Compartmentalized
Plan that my sanity can buy
But it's easy nowadays to standardize
And rationalize
And glamorize
This bullshit enterprise
Because thinness has come to epitomize
What it is to be a woman.
Why do we have to wonder what it's like
To eat bread without guilt and fear
Or clear your plate without a goddamn jeer
All I'm asking is for it to not be so severe
Because as every girl ages a year
The more she needs to adhere
To a life surrounding nothing but how she appears
Because that will domineer
Everything she holds dear
Sending it back into the rear-
view until it disappears.
We all know what it's like
To be either long-legged, thick-armed, wide-hipped or rail-thin,
So don't tell me there's only one skin to be in
Because that woman over there isn't my twin
And we shouldn't have to shop from the same measurements bin
And in case you hadn't noticed no changes have been
Made so when will we begin
To stop making eating the worst sin
Or losing weight the highest win
A woman can make.
My impatience is overflowing
And my anger is growing
From all the crowing
That this is the only thing I have going
And they keep blowing
It off like it's just my emotions flowing
But I can't go through life knowing
That our progress is slowing.
Because as much as we might
Try to ignore, it's happening left and right
So when can I stop feeling like this is my personal fight
Or telling the truth and feeling contrite
That is why I invite
Other women to share their insight
Because this can't keep being treated like an oversight
When it's our shared plight
And if there's one thing that's black and white
It's that knowing someone else's experience can make you feel alright.
And why I believe our future can be bright.
So the more I recite
What I've managed to write
The one thing I'd want to highlight
Is for you to take a bite.
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