[Intro Music. Vincent Tone - New Summits]
Hey guys so, I guess today's going to be a new Vlog. Went to get my Lidocaine IV
today. Um, I got it about an hour ago, today it made me feel like absolute crap.
I wasn't overly nauseated, but of course there were times where I felt like I was
going to puke. This time the Lidocaine made me feel
very loopy, weak, and I was really shaking a lot um which is never good cuz it's
not fun to feel like crap. Um and yeah, right now I pretty much look like - I
pretty much look like crap and I really do feel like crap. Really
have not been having a good day. Um, I didn't get very good sleep last night, so
that could be why the Lidocaine really did not agree with me today. And also
while I was getting my IV and I was in the bathroom, I just had this weird
thought pop in my head, and it's like you know I wandered you know, why am I here?
Why am I sick? Why did I have to get sick? Why do I have to be sick? So yeah, my mind
is not being nice to me today. Just - we did some shopping today too, we did
shopping before I got my IV, and then after. It's really a struggle but luckily
I've been able to find wheelchairs at every store so far so that's been really
good. Usually going into the grocery store there's not a wheelchair for me to
use, but at this particular store there was one so, I was really happy about that.
I also talked to my Chronic Pain Doctor, or me and mom did, and he's going to talk
to my family doctor so I can get something stronger for my pain other
than toradol, because even with the Lidocaine I still do have quite a bit of
pain especially in the evenings, and it definitely interrupts my sleep and
interferes with my sleep, and makes it very difficult to sleep, and you know, do
anything. I don't think you can, or at least I can't really rely upon the Lidocaine alone
to give me pain relief, you sometimes you need that immediate pain relief. So
hopefully I can get an opioid. I know some people are really um touchy on the
subject of opioids with the current Opioid Epidemic, War on Drugs - that type
of thing, and the whole opioids not really helping for Chronic Pain -
supposedly, even though there's no long-term research. But yeah I need
something. I've tried - if you watched my Chronic Pain story journey whatever, I've
tried pretty much every therapy over the years to help my Chronic Pain, and the
Lidocaine is pretty much the only thing that has helped my Chronic Pain, over the
past you know, however long eight years - actually nine years - that I've been
dealing with Chronic Pain. So I've tried anti-depressants, SSRIs which is the
different antidepressants, I've tried anti-inflammatories, tried steroids, you
know I tried every type of pill you can imagine for Chronic Pain that isn't
opioids or narcotics. I've tried massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, osteopathic -
like everything for pain. So that's pretty much at the end of my rope, so
this is the last resort, and that's what opioids are supposed to be for, for
people with Chronic Pain. I tried every option so this is the last thing
and I'm hoping that it will help me enough that it can alleviate some pain. I'm
currently vlogging in a really busy parking lot and I think people are kind
of looking at me when I'm talking to my iPod. Kind of awkward but I really don't
care. This is just gonna be like a bit of a health update slash life update
because I feel like I haven't talked about either of those things for quite a
while. Most of the vlogs that I've done this
past summer is just kind of um me doing things and not really talking about
my health too too much, or my life, or whatever was you know, going on then. Um so
just a warning this is going to be very, very chatty and probably quite long.
I'm just gonna start in chronological order of things that have happened. In the last
clip in this vlog you would have seen is of me getting a Lidocaine IV. That
happened about a month ago, I think at the beginning of November if I'm not
mistaken - um it's now at the beginning of December
so that's how long I haven't Vlogged. The last Lidocaine IV I had done wore off
pretty quick. Um, I had filmed all my videos for the rest of November and for
the month of December - actually didn't film all of them because I still quite a
few more I have to film. But um I filmed the majority of them and that put me in
a big flare, and my Lidocaine kind of just crapped out on me,
and I was left with a lot of pain for about a week and a half -
um well technically I think about probably two weeks now it is because I'm
still in a lot of pain. I just recently went for another Lidocaine IV but it hasn't
fully kicked in yet. It's been bad to the point where it feels like how I - my pain
kind of feels like how I felt before I even you know, got my IVs of Lidocaine
regularly, so that's kind of how bad pain is - if you can you know, kind of um I
guess imagine. Basically my pain is pretty bad. The baddest it got was um I
think about two Saturdays ago I'm not sure how long it was now, um I tried
various times to go out to see Murder on the Orient Express in theatres with my
brother and sister, um yeah I tried to get out to see a movie twice, failed twice
because the first time I had gotten some little viral bug thing that made me
extremely weak, and then the second time I was in so much pain I couldn't move. It
got so bad to the point where my hands were in so much pain that I could not
type on my computer, I couldn't even caption a video - like a little
five-minute video to get it up, I couldn't write the description, I couldn't write
the title. My hands were useless, it hurt to even pick up my phone to scroll
through Twitter or Facebook or Instagram or anything.
My hands were in so much pain, my legs were in so much pain, I was just in a lot
of pain. It was probably one of the worst pain days I've had in a few months. It
had gotten bad again and it's always frustrating when I can't get a video up
which honestly doesn't happen very often, but when it does happen I become
you know, kind of frustrated. Um, I have been putting up videos - two videos a week
since May, which I feel quite proud of that I've been doing that, but um
sometimes it isn't so easy when you can't use your hands
to type, or to edit - or anything like that. So yeah um, it's just really
disheartening and it makes everything so much more difficult. Um
but overall the pain just like all over my body - like my lower back, my hips, um it's
been really affecting my hips, and my knees - I find my knees hurt a lot more
lately as well. So yeah that's kind of just something that's been going on for
boat you know two weeks now, where I'm just in very heightened levels of pain
and I'm not getting the pain relief that I should be getting from my Lidocaine. So
the next thing I want to talk about is something that's very difficult for me
to talk about, and it something you know, obviously horrible that happened. On
Monday November 27th my kitty, Tazz he died. So if you've watched - I had a vlog
up um quite a while ago - I think either in July or August and talked I talked about Tazz,
um and his health, and he was diagnosed with an Enlarged Heart,
he had a Heart Murmur, he had Thyroid Disease - he had a few other things wrong with
him. He was a sick kitty and he was an old kitty, he was about 16 years old, so
his time came to an end on Monday. Yeah, that day he was - he
seemed okay before he started to go down hill. Um, he was very happy,
he wanted treats, he was uh you know - kind of annoying my sister when she was trying
to paint, and he was trying to walk on her paintings and just you know, bugging
her and she wasn't able to get you know, what she wanted to do done because he
was annoying her - so we gave him some treats to get him to calm down, and a
while later he was in my sister's room and she noticed that his breathing was
off, so we got my mom to come upstairs and she said you know, it's time. We've
been expecting Tazzy to you know, be at the end of his life for a long time now,
like for a few months at least. We did not expect for him to you know make it
through the winter basically, which is what happened. Um so anyways, my mom called up
the vet, luckily they were open - they have winter hours which is great, so we were
able to take um Tazzy out to the vet and he was euthanized, because he was - his lungs were
basically filling with fluid and he was in heart failure. Yeah, I don't think he
suffered terribly, he lasted - I mean even to his last days he was very happy, he
was very snuggly, he's was still even playful, he still played with his string and mouse,
he was still so happy, and just - just my kitty. So we had to put him to sleep, I
was there for the entire thing, I was bawling my eyes out of course, as you can
imagine. I was just grieving so so hard I did not want my kitty to die, cuz he's my
first kitty, and I just I'd loved him so much. So um we brought him home, I cried
some more, I cried for a very long time. I got Beasty to say goodbye to him when
we took him to the vet because I knew that was going to be the last time Beast
was ever going to see Tazzy alive, and then when we brought him home while
he was, he was you know, he, - after he passed away Beast you know, he sniffed Tazzy
and he obviously knew that Tazzy had died, and then the next day when we buried him -
Beast was right there when I was burying him. So yeah, it was all very very
difficult to go through. Um, not something I ever want to go through in the near
future. We already lost Fraidy Cat
earlier this year in March and it was frozen over, there was snow on the ground,
and we couldn't bury him with all the other cats, but my Dad put him nearby
where we buried all our other kitties so, Tazzy's next to all the other kitties
we ever had, that had died. So he's buried with all you know, his Brothers. Now
Beastie and Missy they lost a brother. Beastie no longer has big brother.
Beasties now the only boy in the house, and he's now my only kitty, because Tazz was
my kitty - I could say I had you know, two adorable little kitties that were
mine. But now I only have one, and it's really sad, it's really difficult. Um, I'm
trying not to cry. I mean all the wounds are still very fresh, I mean it happened
almost a week now - tomorrow it will be a week. I really love my Tazzy and I made
sure he knew that before he died, I think he - he knew that so much. He was such a
wonderful cat, he was so snuggly. Um, my mum she misses him so much because Tazz
slept with he like every single night. So the next thing I guess I should
talk about, um it's again about my pain and stuff. I recently got a Lidocaine
IV on Thursday the 30th of November, um last time when I had gotten an IV, um - my,
I mentioned it earlier that my Chronic Pain doctor wanted to get my family
doctor to prescribe me something for pain like you know, an opioid
or something - cuz I've tried everything. Um, what else do you try after you've
tried everything right? Basically at this appointment I was finally prescribed
something for my pain that is hopefully going to help my pain. Um, I was
prescribed codeine. I'll be on 15 milligrams which is a very low dose. Um,
so yeah I'll be on that. Um, I think I take it on all my you know, bad pain
days - so that's really good for me because um, I don't have anything that
effectively helps my pain when I have I have bad pain days. I feel like this is kind
of a victory for me because I've been living with Chronic Pain - Chronic
Widespread Pain for nine years now. I've tried everything that I can think of to
help my pain. I'm just hoping that the codeine will help my pain. So yeah, I'm
really hoping that this does help me, it's been you know, it's been nine years
of me going to doctors trying everything and I'm finally getting you know, finally
getting the treatment that I need. That's that. I still haven't taken it yet
because I I have to get the prescription. So yeah, I'll let you guys know on how
that goes, I'm hoping it'll help my pain, I really am.
I have one thing to talk about I believe - yeah I do.
Um on December 1st it was nine years that I've been sick -
that was my I guess illness anniversary. It's been nine years since I've been
sick with Chronic Lyme Disease, and I've had Chronic Pain, and all these other
health conditions and whatnot. Um I made a video on you know, kind of the
day I got sick because I remember the exact day I got sick. I remember the
exact moment, the exact feelings, everything I felt - I remember it so
vividly like it was yesterday. I remember the day so vividly because it
was literally the day that I stopped being healthy, and it was literally
the day that I got sick so, here I am nine years later still laying in bed.
Definitely not a good anniversary, not something I celebrate and something I'm
kind of cynical of. But yeah, um I think this talk is coming to an end. I just you know,
kind of wanted to update you guys on my health and everything's going on in my life
because I think this has been an eventful few weeks for me. I know this was a
very rambly video, and I'm sorry if you hate these type of videos, but obviously for
those of you were interested in my life and wants to know whats going on then
this update you know, that's kind of for you.
So yeah um, I hope you guys enjoyed this video. Please be sure to give it a thumbs
up, subscribe for new. Please be sure to hit the notification button down below to
get notified when I upload new videos. All my social media links will be in the
description below, and I hope to see you right next time, bye!
[Outro Music. Vincent Tone - New Summits]
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