From never-ending showers to being a super spy, the Planet Dolan Crew re-enacts some
of the best true stories from our subreddit about the dumbest excuses we've ever heard.
I'm Zaraganba, and today, I'll be your narrator.
Number 10 was Submitted by Karmen0619 Emojie Emojie was on Facebook one day, and saw a
woman wanting to divorce her husband.
Her husband had been cheating on her, which she knew because she caught him in the act
of sleeping with another woman on the bedroom floor.
The husband's excuse was that he wasn't sleeping with her, and that he did not know who she
was.
He got out of the shower, bumped into her, tripped, and fell on top of her.
The divorce was finalized in a matter of minutes.
Number 9 was Submitted by MarvinMartian1 Froggy When Froggy was 18, her boyfriend would stand
her up on almost everything.
The excuse was almost always a made-up illness.
It was so obvious it got a little pathetic after a while.
Nobody could be ill that often.
One day he was meant supposed to meet Froggy, and his excuse for canceling was "I fell
over and hurt my knee."
They broke up not long after that, and Froggy never looked back.
Number 8 was Submitted by PlayNice9001 Ursa One of Ursa's college friends was notorious
for flaking out on events at the last second.
She canceled parties and group hang-outs an hour before they were scheduled, even though
they were planned days or even weeks in advance.
Usually the reasons for canceling were things like excessive homework or just being tired.
But the worst excuse she gave was that she decided she'd rather play Overwatch.
She didn't even try to dress it up or anything.
She canceled a Halloween party they'd been planning for days at literally at the last
second.
She ruined everybody's Halloween plans all just so she could play Overwatch.
Ursa and her friends don't hang out with her very much anymore.
Number 7 was Submitted by PartyCreeper1098 JamesShark
The dumbest excuse JamesShark have ever heard is when he was about to go to a friend's house
for a sleepover.
They said JamesShark couldn't come over yet because they were taking a shower and that
he could come later.
JamesShark waited a few hours later and called again.
They said they were STILL IN THE SHOWER.
At the point, he knew he was being blown off, and just stopped calling because his friend
obviously didn't want him to come over.
The next day, the friend's mother told JamesShark that his friends was actually really busy
and didn't want to tell him he couldn't come.
So instead he came up with an infinite shower excuse.
Number 6 was Submitted by Applegirl_7 Snewpee The dumbest excuse Snewpee ever heard was
when she was 13.
Her brother stole 5 dollars from her and lied about it.
His alibi was that he couldn't have stolen the money because he was painting a picture.
He even gave Snewpee the picture to prove it.
Aside from the obvious ones, there were a couple of huge problems with this excuse.
The first was that Snewpee's brother was allergic to an ingredient in paint.
The second problem?
The picture he had submitted as proof he was painting was just a computer-printed copy
of the Mona Lisa.
Number 5 was Submitted by Nuclear_Nerd666 Dolan
The dumbest excuse Dolan ever heard was in his first year of college.
He was walking to his room, when he ran into a guy who had borrowed one of his books, but
never returned it.
Dolan caught up to him, and asked for his book back.
He said that he had go to have sex with his pet turtle.
Later, Dolan found out from his friend, who was the guy's roommate, that the book thief
had eaten the book.
Like...
EATEN it.
He tore out all 805 pages and ate them.
Moral of the story: don't let people borrow your stuff.
Number 4 was Submitted by MysticTulip Andiemations The dumbest excuse Andie ever heard was from
a co-worker at her job.
Andie was enjoying a hard-earned two-week vacation.
But after only a few days, she was called back into work because one of the employees
called in sick.
Now, being sick isn't really a bad excuse.
But what she actually said was, "I'm feeling sick, I won't be back till Tuesday."
That call came in on Thursday.
For some reason, this woman was too sick to come into work, but somehow knew the EXACT
DAY she'd be able to come back.
And that day was five days later, after the weekend.
Sure, there was a chance she was really sick.
But it seemed awfully suspicious.
It turned out Andie was right.
Her co-worker had taken a trip to a nearby city for an entire 4-day weekend, just so
she could go shopping.
Number 3 was Submitted by DopieXD Hellbent When Hellbent was in middle school, he had
a girlfriend for more than a year and a half, and he thought everything was going great.
But after all that time, his girlfriend suddenly said she wanted to break up.
When Hellbent asked her why, she said that she was an international super spy, and her
organization had told her to choose between her boyfriend or her job.
It's probably worth noting that Kim Possible was a really popular show around this time.
The very next week she was dating some jock.
So much for her spy work.
Number 2 was Submitted by Cookiemonster106 Robo
When Robo was in 6th Grade, her class went on an outdoor field trip.
When they were playing the last game of the day, one girl said, "I did the splits in the
lake!"
It obviously looked like she peed her pants, and everybody knew it.
But first of all, why would she do splits in the lake?
That made no sense.
And more importantly... there was no lake anywhere for miles around.
After that field trip, the same girl peed her pants at least 8 more times before the
end of the school year, and didn't go on any more field trips.
It probably wasn't "splits in the lake" those other 8 times, either.
Number 1 – What's the dumbest excuse you've ever heard?
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