Holly and Phil: Don't brush Ant's drink-drive shame under the carpet - do your job
Why? It's their job to discuss the issues of the week and Ant being fined a record £86k for being wrecked at the wheel is surely a biggie.
You can't just brush front-page news under the carpet because it involves a friend.
The gaunt, haunted face of McPartlin appearing in court this week is everywhere.
After being banned for 20 months for being twice the drink-drive limit the star said he was "ashamed and mortified".
Sorry but if you get behind the wheel after a skinful and hit a car with a little kid in it you deserve nothing but contempt.
There are thousands, if not millions, of ordinary people in this country going through painful divorces, battles with addiction and coping with physical and mental ill health but most of us wouldn't hit the bottle on a Sunday morning and get in the motor.
.
Ant hasn't been.
And aren't you curious to know exactly how he came to be that drunk, with his poor mum, in a car so early on a Sunday? And don't let the UK record fine fool you, it'll take Ant – on a cool £130,000 A WEEK! – only four days to pay it off.
I get that he is a national treasure and, together with Dec, is very good at what he does.
They turn several rather average TV shows into telly gold.
Saturday Night Takeaway would be just a cheap rip-off of Noel's House Party and Chris Evans's Don't Forget Your Toothbrush if it wasn't for Ant & Dec.
A case very much proven when we had to endure the screeching Scarlet Moffatt and gormless Stephen Mulhern in the last confused, Ant-free instalment of Takeaway.
To her credit Ant's estranged wife Lisa Armstrong has kept an incredibly dignified silence throughout the whole mess.
She must be torn apart to witness someone she loved for so long hitting the self-destruct button.
Because, make no mistake, that's exactly what Ant is doing.
Of course you would need a heart of stone not to wish Ant a full and speedy return to health.
Which is about all Holly and Phil managed to say on the matter.
Although on the upside it did stop them bloody giggling together for at least five minutes.
____________ .
Man City hero Vincent Kompany has been trolled because he was filmed celebrating his club's league title win with his wife's family.
What's so wrong with that, you may ask? Well Carla Kompany's family happen to be down-to-earth Mancs who live in a very down-to-earth house.
"Looks like something out of Coronation Street" and "Curtains from 1978" were just some of the nicer comments.
Jeez, give the man a break.
Footballers are often taken to task for being too flash with the cash and out of touch with us ordinary folk.
Kompany keeps it real.
A proper winner all round.
____________ .
Talking of Corrie, fan Paul O'Grady said that the soap is so depressing these days it's like the Syrian war.
Really? The Street may be dull, dark and totally devoid of laughs but can you seriously compare it to gassed kids and bombs? But maybe you can if you're a celeb.
Engaging brain before opening your gob doesn't appear to be a necessary requirement for that job, does it? ____________ .
The whole Windrush debacle is heart- breaking and depressing.
Proud Brits who have worked for this country for decades are being kicked out because, in most cases, they simply don't have the correct paperwork any more.
The Home Secretary, Amber Rudd, admitted that she doesn't know whether Caribbean migrants who were invited here after WW2 have been wrongly deported.
Who was running the Home Office when this unholy mess started? One Theresa May.
____________ Stabbed burglar Scrotey McScroteface (refusing to name-check the scumbag) had his birthday celebrated by his relatives on Monday.
They did so by chanting "Gypsy and proud" outside hero OAP Richard Osborn-Brooks' home.
Nice.
But what annoyed me is why have the PC Brigade forced the rest of us to call them "travellers" these days? ____________ .
The very weird creature that is Liz Hurley has proudly posed in fishnet stockings, a corset and girly hair bunches while cuddling up to her 16-year-old son, Damian.
OK so it's a still from the latest instalment of US series The Royals where our Liz plays the Queen and her lad has a bit part.
But La Hurley, 52, is also very proud of the fact that poor Damian takes every single one of those sexy swimsuit photos his mum posts online.
He's one cheeky little devil isn't he.
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