welcome to the daily awesome podcast Steve Mayeda here and we are talking
about relationships Manning up knowing your perspective in a relationship and
being able to speak your mind because so many men are not able to do it and we
confuse ourselves in that and this actually stems from a question on our
men's development excellence call which is happening right now September 13th
2017 and we got ten dudes on from all around the world in fact this question
came from Australia but people from all over are part of this this is actually
what the third fourth hour that were on this call man crazy stuff so we do it
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so let's get back to this man we're all confused we're all confused in fact
there was something on the Austin men's Development Board today about oh my god
you know my girlfriend said this and you know some guy asked her out you didn't
tell me and blah blah blah blah and there's like this fucking time bomb of
confusion and then this confusion comes in of going on at least in that guy's
particular case of like am i a man or how do i alpha up or what do I do to
make sure that I haven't forsaken the rights of being a fucking guy that
because I'm afraid that I might lose that now what the fuck geez what fucking
world are we living in and that's the sad thing man this is so terrible I mean
I've been teaching since God like 2006 in the problem with this is is that men
don't have anybody to look up to in their lives so they think that they're
fucking I'm inadequate this is the fucking big plague that runs across the
world and women have it too I only work with men but women have it too and then
there's this explosion of feminism that's got to equate equate to their
identity there's an explosion of masculinity that's got to make up your
identity but look it's a pretty fucking simple thing and this goes to the guy
who's on the call is well the dude is on the board is there
something about your relationship you don't like then you don't like it you
quit it you stop it or you accept what's happening and you deal with it and in
that you will learn what it's worth so let's review this really quick because
this is the secret to your masculinity in everything that you do this is the
secret to holding on so yeah masculine edge that masculine energy all this shit
that you're fuckin starved for that you think you're fuckin up on is that do you
like it and if you don't can you stand up for that see why is this so fucking
hard but it's been hard for me I mean we've all been there look I know I'm
being a little bit judgmental and you know kind of like pissed off about this
but we've all been there we've all been that guy they didn't know and we're like
okay well you know maybe I can make this work because of the sex and here's how
it goes guys you're in a relationship man the sex is fucking awesome you know
she's really cool she does all this stuff for me the cooking is great when
I'm not gonna find another girl like this is this all are these all reasons
for you not living a good life I mean the love and relationships are great and
I'll tell you this this compromises all day long that happened in my
relationship but Jesus Christ man and first off I have a shit ton of
experience that to bring this all into is that man this is really good
this is and this is what I want it's never actually about like oh my god am i
doing what's supposed to be right or you know fuck I might lose my man points or
somehow I'm gonna be affected in this way cuz see this is the thing every
goddamn person is afraid of something what is this you know look at all those
like fucking guys that get into the like pickup all right we have to do this with
the relationships or else we have to do that we have to control women in this
way we have to have more value or else they're gonna take advantage of us
because you know being shit on in these ways is blah blah blah blah why is that
so bad what you know what fuck man somebody's gonna screw you over in life
that's gonna happen a lot you put yourself on the line you're gonna get
fucked you're gonna be in a confusing situation why is that bad everything
good in my life comes from being shaped from that now let's look at a
relationship man there's gonna be times in your relationship where you do shit
you don't like your chick may not want to have sex with you your chick may be a
bitch your chick may embarrass you your chick may be better than you your mate
your chick may not be good enough in some ways or whatever it is why is it
that you go into an emergency mode with that or it's a bad thing it is what it
is it's real fucking simple there's there are things you do not like and are
you willing to live with them or do you want to end it but in order to be the
guy that ends it it has to be this big fucking deal or in order to be the guy
that bears with it it has to be this fucking big big big deal we got to bring
all this other shit into it when it's just as simple as that it's pretty black
and white even though I get that a relationship has so much gray area in
that but focus on that and don't bring your baggage of I'm not good enough I'm
not man enough I'm searching for an identity or whatever and I know a lot of
guys at this point say but I'm not looking at those things well then
fucking just make the decision okay I didn't want to break up with her today
because of these problems and here are the problems I don't want her to move
out I like you know she's a good person I don't want to hurt her and you know
she cooks and cleans from my place and sometimes she sucks my dick and fucking
swallows or whatever the fuck it is right cool
good then now if we go to this you have decided to live in a life where you're
you don't like certain things but you're bearing with it cool is that what you
want yes okay cool bitch about it with your friends or
whatever but stop making the argument about this bigger fucking thing of
masculinity because it's a when it comes down to a man it's a pretty clear-cut
choice all right and see this is one of those things man everybody thinks the
way that they're going to get happiness is by being the good person
that's defined by somebody else it has nothing to do with that
I mean specifically by that is like I'm gonna be a good person
if I can stick it out in this relationship to respect the idea of
relationships my woman or whatever I'm gonna be a good person because if I do
this and accomplish these goals I'm gonna be fuckin you know gain these
traits of so and so know you gain traits you gain traits from going through times
where you put yourself on the line that might be staying in this relationship
and holding out and seeing what it is in owning the responsibilities and the
experiences of your choices in that some may effects people really good some may
affect people really bad but your ownership of that choice is what gives
you your values this is where you well derive the meaning of love the meaning
of honesty the meaning of integrity and whatever else that you are looking to
respect and cultivate about yourself but stop lying to yourself and other people
about what this really is because once again it's really simple
all right she's doing something I don't like and it's unbearable but I'm gonna
try Barratt she's doing something that I don't like and I don't want to do this I
get it we need to ask for advice we need to bounce shit off friends but when it
becomes a broken record and week after week and especially when we see shit
like where it's like you got to be alpha in order to fucking make her like you or
something or that's how women fuck you over now look guys let me just tell you
a little secret here if you're sexually active and you want to be good with
women you want to enjoy sex and pleasure and all these cool fucking things the
goddamn my life was lived as and still is lived as women screw you over and
it's not that big of a deal it's actually kind of cool to talk about you
know what's even cooler is a woman screwing you over and doing a bunch of
shit and having all sorts of bad stuff and you know everything else in your
life or whatever that you're passionate about kind of gives you this big wall of
resistance it kind of says hey I can live through this and I don't need to be
scared all my fucking life and make rules and build a prison of belief
surround myself just because I can't handle freedom in any case daily
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later bye
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