(lips popping)
- Really like my side profile like this.
(board clicking)
(brass fanfare)
I should maybe just talk like this for the whole video
because I like my profile.
(laughing)
Hello everybody and welcome back to my channel.
My name's Thomas, if you're brand new here
and I make style and hair related videos every single week.
So if that's your thing, make sure you
hit the subscribe button and stick around.
God, I'm getting good at that intro.
Today, we are just doing a Q and A again.
These have become one of the funnest ways
for me to interact with you guys,
and actually talk about a variety of things
outside of hair.
Yeah, I don't know, it's just going to be very good.
So the way I've been sourcing all of this, you know, intel
is, I've been using the Community feed
on the YouTube platform.
I'll just post a picture saying, "Q and A time,"
and you guys go and flood me with questions.
I got another 80 questions this time,
which was awesome.
I've just picked out, again,
you know, a mixture of hair-related questions,
and just personal ones as well,
which I'm gonna be answering today.
So I think without further ado,
we should just get into it.
(wooshing)
Alrighty, so let's get into question one.
I'm just gonna have to turn on my side profile again
to read the question.
Just give me two secs.
So question number one is from Sanji Vinsmoke.
I think that's how you say it.
Okay, the short answer of this question is never.
I have a really, really brittle hair type
so using heat products, even with a heat protector,
it's just so risky.
Especially with hair types like mine.
Like, my hair type is quite brittle
and can break quite easily already,
so it's just something I would never recommend to someone.
If you are gonna, you know, take the plunge and do it,
I guess you could just keep it to like
once or twice every fortnight,
but I wouldn't be doing it a lot,
especially if you're consciously not using
a heat protector, because yeah,
you'll just damage your hair.
If you're serious about keeping it healthy,
you need to, you know, lessen the amount you're using
those tools and up the amount of products you're using
to keep it healthy.
That's essentially it.
Do you know what they fucked up thing is though?
Most people with dead straight hair,
they have the most durable hair type.
That type of hair can withstand heat
out of most hair types you even see.
It's the people with the curly, frizzy hair
who actually want straight hair that are at real risk
of having damage.
So it just doesn't make sense.
What was god thinking?
Stupid.
Side profile. (wooshing)
The next question is from Jared Baldwin.
Jared said
Whoa, do I have a novel to write about this.
When I read this question, I was like,
"This actually requires a really detailed answer."
So in the description box, I'm gonna leave like
a full description of like, what I really think of this.
But essentially, that lonely feeling,
we're programmed as human beings
to want companionship, right?
It's a natural thing to feel, like, lonely.
In my experience, when I feel that lonely feeling,
I can't stand it.
I'm like, "Ah, get it away from me.
"Just, no, I don't want it, how do I get away from this?"
But what that escaping mechanism does
is it actually can make you latch onto the wrong person
at the wrong time.
So if you're already a frail person,
or you've already got a few issues
and you're desperate to find someone,
you'll probably find someone that's not even a good match
and then they'll probably hurt you.
And then, furthermore to that, like,
we psychologically, I don't want to get too deep here,
but psychologically we kind of base our future perception
on things that have happened in the past.
So if you have a history of desperately connecting
with the wrong people and then having them hurt you,
you're almost lining yourself up for that again.
I think it's really important to remember
that your youth is about figuring out who you are
and really cementing in what you want
to create in the world.
So by the time you've built it up,
when the actual right person for you comes along,
you've got something great to share,
you've got stories, you've got a bit of depth.
There's all of this stuff.
I think at young ages we get tricked into the idea
of thinking that we need to fall in love right now,
because of that desperate need of companionship.
The only real way, I think, to deal with
the desperate need of companionship is to just
put perspective on it and be like,
"Well, I'm young."
Right now, as a millennial, it's important to figure out
who you are and what you're really enjoying
and what you're putting together.
By taking on that commitment, you're essentially like,
delaying your development as a person.
So it just all is a big clash.
I reckon work on the inner first.
Acknowledge that that desperate need for love
or that fear of loneliness is natural and normal.
Everyone gets it.
I get it.
But it's not important right this second.
You're building yourself, and then
when you have built yourself correctly,
the right person is just gonna swoop you up and love you.
So that's my two cents.
Tom, the Love Advisor.
That's me.
(wooshing)
Okay, this username is a little bit out there.
So this one's from Suicidal Goat.
To answer this question, yes, I do have plenty of tips
to tame frizzy hair.
I've done multiple videos about them.
You can see them all in the cards.
But I actually did one recently as well.
I got the feeling that not many people wanted to know
about curly, frizzy hair, but particularly with this
Q and A, I had a lot of frizzy hair questions coming through
and I'm like, "Are you guys seeing my stuff?"
Like, what's going on?
Like, what's YouTube doing?
So, yeah, just let me know.
And if you aren't seeing my curly, frizzy hair content,
make sure you hit the bell button on the subscription thing
because it'll notify you when I do upload.
So, yeah.
Okay, to keep it short, maybe start off with an argon oil,
because that always helps reduce frizz and make hair
a little bit more fluffy.
You could also go and try any of the methods that I've done.
I've done wash and go treatment.
That worked really well for taming frizz in
and defining curls.
I also did the chapta paste and braids video,
which is the one I did recently that most of you
seem to have missed.
The best advice I can give on frizzy hair
is save up a bit of money, get a keratin treatment,
and just see how it goes on your hair.
Lots of people think that keratin treatments make it curly.
That's a whole 'nother kettle of fish.
But de-frizzing, keratin.
Do it.
So the next question is from JoMcD21.
Joe says
Oh, side profile.
I don't know, maybe she's born with it.
(laughing)
To really answer why I'm fabulous, I don't know.
You guys should be telling me.
I'm just me and doing my thing,
so if you think that's fabulous, tell me why.
Then I can probably incorporate that into my answer
next time someone asks me that.
But thank you.
I'm very flattered that you think I'm fabulous.
(bell chiming)
Question number five.
This one is from the Nightmare Before Ayden.
You guys have such interesting names.
Holy hell, another one that I really relate to.
I honestly wish that I could show you guys my to-do lists
behind all of this stuff,
because getting all of this rigged up
and the ideas in place, it takes a lot of planning,
and it is very, very stressful.
To make all of this happen, I've really gotta keep clear
on the end goal.
I have a mind like a pinball machine, right?
It goes do-do-do-do-do.
I suffer from this thing that I call, like,
the End Project Syndrome.
When a project has a lot of moving pieces
and you have the whole project syndrome,
it's almost impossible to kind of like,
not look at the big picture.
But the only way I actually can get on top of my shit
is by pulling pieces of the big picture out
and going, "I need to put all of my attention on this"
so I can do it properly, I can do it at a quality standard,
and I can get it out of the road.
By prioritising which tasks are gonna go
best to the end goal, you start with those first.
They might be the shittiest ones, like taxing and accounting
and all that crap,
but if you put them into perspective of how they matter
and then focus one at a time.
When the big picture comes back in and goes,
"You've got this big picture to make, oh my god,
"blah blah blah," you can just go,
"Hang on a minute.
"In order to get to that big picture,
"I have to complete this step,
"and I have to complete it properly."
I totally feel you though, with having too much
on stress, having a meltdown.
Like, I honestly, it takes me to have a meltdown
before I go, "Hang on a minute."
Just put everything on a bit of paper,
prioritise it out which ones are most effective to the goal,
one, two, three, four.
By the time I get to those steps,
if I focus my attention on one
and know that I've done it properly
by the time I get to the end I go,
"Cool, the job's been done
"and I know that I've done it properly."
Rather than going whole picture,
and trying to shuffle all my stuff around
to make it all work and it just ends up a big mess
and I don't like the end result.
I'm a really results-driven person.
Honestly, just try it like that.
Moving pieces, grab one, and the priority that it is.
That's the big key.
I hope that helps.
(wooshing)
Question number six is from Matt V.
Matt, I love you.
You turn up week after week after week after week
and leave me a comment in the comments section.
I just really wanted to, first,
before I even answer your question,
just say I'm really grateful for that.
So Matt said
So what that sounds like to me
is it sounds like your hair type actually doesn't struggle
with self-moisturizing as it is.
It's good to use a moisturiser,
but only when your hair's dry.
Now, for someone like me, my hair is always dry.
The sebum from my scalp struggles to travel down the hair
so I need to get the moisture from somewhere else.
If your hair gets oily very easily
then you probably don't need to be
using a conditioner that much.
I wouldn't say use it every day,
because you will get an even more oily, buttery effect
and that's kind of what, I'm guessing from your question,
is what you want to avoid.
Just take note of it.
Usually with people that get really oily hair,
it'll happen around the roots section.
So the roots can be really well oiled,
but then you just check the ends.
If the ends feel nice, or if they don't feel dry,
just leave it.
If they do feel a bit dry, just add your moisture to the end
and leave it at that.
Okay, the next question is from Daym-ja3-enol.
Oh god, they keep getting better.
Oh, I'm so glad you asked, actually.
I could incorporate this into the Man Bun Monthly series,
because there is quite a few different things
you can do to add more masculinity to your man bun,
but the number one tip I'm gonna give right here
is to start growing a bit of facial hair, if you can.
So you guys will notice as well,
the last, I think, 10 videos or whatever,
I've been loving having a bit of scruff.
You can see, I've grown it out a little bit.
I feel like it's made my face a lot more masculine looking,
but not only that, I have quite an oval head,
so when I shave all of my beard hair off
my face kind of looks very round in a way.
So I feel like beard actually helps really shape,
but also add a little bit of masculinity to my look.
As my hair's grown longer
and I'm wearing hairstyles like this,
side profile,
I think, yeah, it's really enhanced it.
If you guys do want me to add, like, a segment about this
in the Man Bun Monthly series, just comment the hashtag
mascmanbun, okay?
Oh, okay.
Question number eight.
I can't believe I'm gonna answer this.
Okay, well there's a long list of things
that I could rattle off, but the one that comes to mind
and the most recent was Brandon, you know Coach Brandon.
Like, we did Timid Talk together.
We went to the casino for his going away party.
I'd had a few drinks.
Probably about 11:30 at night, everyone was like,
"Okay, we've had enough, we're gonna go home,"
and I was like (scoffing), "Go home?
"What?"
Funnily enough, that night was the last night
that the gay bar on the Gold Coast was closing down.
My housemate at the time, Gordon,
was like, "Come hang out at the gay bar.
"It's shutting down, they've got an open bar."
Like, they had closed the premises already.
They just had an open bar.
So when I rocked up there, there was just
bottle after bottle after bottle of alcohol on the bench
and you could just go up, pour your own drink,
and have a party.
So what did I do?
I went like, "Okay, what do I like on this bench?"
and I grabbed the Canadian Club, straight up,
and within, I think, about 20 minutes,
I had like five Canadian Clubs.
Mind you, at this point, I had already had, like,
three Long Island Teas at the casino.
So I was pretty like, "Woo."
Then somebody pulled out a joint, okay?
I can't believe I'm touching on this,
but they pulled out a joint and the state I was in,
I was like, "Yeah, give me everything."
Oh my god.
I polished off those Canadian Clubs,
had two drags of this joint,
and then I started getting real, like,
everyone was smoking inside as well.
I'm just trying to give you a picture.
This was a like a AWOL, no rules party.
As soon as I had the point, I started getting real, like,
(groaning)
I don't know if anyone knows.
If you smoke weed and drink at the same time,
they can really, like, clash.
I had had like a lot of alcohol.
I started losing brain to mouth communication.
Someone would go, "Hey, you feeling okay?"
And I'd be like, (mumbling)
You know what I mean?
In my mind, I was still wasted,
but I knew, I was like, "Tom, you're losing control, man.
"You've got to get out of here."
The club was placed was, there was the inside area
then there was a bridge that led to the outside area
where everyone would go and smoke and dah-dah-dah,
but because it was a private, closed party,
they shut that off.
I was like, "Quick, I've got to make an escape,"
so I went out the door where no one was allowed to go
and I went up to the back.
I spewed about five times.
And I was just like, "This is terrible."
Anyway, Gordon came looking for me.
He couldn't find me anywhere and he was like,
"Oh, Tom must have gone home."
And he left.
So I had vomited so much, my brain was must going,
"What the hell is happening?"
And I just passed out in this little back room.
I woke up at 6:00 a.m. like,
"I better go."
And it was fucking nuts.
I can't believe I was that, like, careless.
So that's my, like, crazy story.
That's like, the craziest thing
that's happened to me lately.
Other than that, just my busy schedule,
which, who wants to frickin' hear about that?
Question number nine.
This one is from JE Arellano.
Or Arellano, it could be that if they're in Spanish.
Okay, I said this a little bit earlier.
Definitely, if you're struggling with curly hair
and taming it, go and try a keratin treatment.
Just try it out.
You'll see what I mean.
It doesn't get rid of the curl.
It relaxes the curl, okay?
So usually my hair is a lot more, like,
and tight.
What it does is it just relaxes it.
So you still have a really curly hair type,
but it's just more manageable,
and it looks different.
Like, it seriously transforms your hair
to make it just like, I don't want to say this,
but like, normal.
It makes it normal and manageable, you know?
It's something that I think everybody
with hair types like mine especially should just try out
at least once, because then you can decide
whether it's for you or not.
I guarantee you after you've had one, you'll be like,
no, we ain't going back to that.
Question number 10, this is the final question
that we're including here.
I like to just include 10 questions because, you know.
It's just a well-rounded number.
This one is from The Man.
They said
Yes.
Okay, let's get deep again, if you're ready for this.
The only way you can really change it
is how you perceive what they're saying.
So if what they're saying is negative
and you're taking on board, in a sense,
your belief system is saying,
oh, they're saying that, that's true.
And that's what gives you that bad feeling.
But if we actually get a little bit more awareness
around what's really going on here.
If somebody actually thinks it's not okay to be different
someone, somewhere in their life has taught them
that it's not okay to be different.
Which, we know, is an absolute load of bullshit.
Because for anything to stand out,
it's gotta be different, right?
So the idea that somebody thinks
that it's not a good thing to be different,
to me it says that they've been a little bit sheltered
or they've had somebody that's really negative
in their life telling them those things.
It kind of makes me feel a little bit sorry for them,
you know what I mean?
If you switch it around and get the awareness on why
they would actually be saying something like that
and thinking, "Aw, shit man, you must have been
"a little bit sheltered."
Naturally, when I feel sorry for somebody
I kind of like, show a bit of empathy
and then move on.
That's, like, the best way that you can do it.
Instead of, if the negative shit they're throwing at you,
if you're actually taking hits from it,
it's because somewhere in you,
you actually are believing what they're saying
and it's bullshit.
It's absolute bullshit.
The only way that you can change it
is by having awareness around what's really going on here.
So in that instance, what's really going on here
is they're sheltered, they're projecting a belief
that they have on you, and you are actually believing it.
So it's like what can we do from within?
Stop believing it.
Acknowledge that they're throwing shade
because of their sheltered cage life and move on.
That's as simple as it needs to be.
We're getting down to two minutes
and I've got to wrap this up.
Yeah, I hope that's a well-rounded answer of that.
I'm gonna put all of those detailed answers
in the description box below for you guys,
because it is something that I find really important.
I do love to sit down and like,
sort of think about these questions
before I actually just answer them.
So yeah, that's what I've done in here
and I really hope you guys enjoyed that.
(wooshing)
Now that I've only got a minute and something left,
I am gonna wrap this video up.
So thank you so much for swinging by
and watching my video this week.
I hope you liked the bananas that we've got here.
Bit of a random touch.
Yeah, if you've got any more questions
regarding anything I've covered in this video,
make sure you just shoot me a comment
and I'll see you next week for another video, okay?
(smooching kisses)
Good bye!
(crashing)
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