Hey there, this is Clay with www.ModernLove.Life and this is the relationship inner game experience.
This week we are going to talk about why dating is hard, why dating is awkward and how you
can make it a little bit less so.
Okay, so the dating world out there, it puts people in a strange mindset where you know,
if you're like the typical person out there, maybe you haven't been following my teachings
or the teachings of other people that advocate similar things to me and instead you're just
asking a person out or going on a date with somebody, And you're going on, you know, the
typical dinner date, maybe the movie date or, or something like that.
And dating can be hard and awkward because situations like this are common date situations.
You know, these are things that you would expect to go on if you were to go on like
the most stereotypical date in the world.
And because of this it puts you in a certain mindset.
We're not really able to step outside of the construct of the date so to speak.
And so you're really focused more on the "Gee I hope this date goes well.
I hope I can impress this person.
I hope this person likes me" as opposed to just exploring each other and seeing if the
two of you actually are able to get along together.
If the two of you actually have things in common, if the two of you actually have similar
values, if the two of you actually enjoy spending time with each other.
Right?
And because of this, because we taking the focus off of the emotional connection and
we're putting it on the context of, Gee, I hope this isn't awkward.
I hope this goes well.
I hope this person likes me.
It.
It really changes the context of how this thing is going to play out.
So what I want to encourage you to do is I'd like to encourage you to go on less dates
so to speak.
Try to avoid these like really cliche type dates, especially if it's the first or maybe
even second date.
Because when you're in the very early stages of dating somebody, you really want to focus
more on their personality, their character, their values, and actually having a connection
with them and in that respect, going on, boring dates is actually the much more effective
than going on these typical kinds of dates.
So I actually prefer going on things like coffee dates or getting something simple like
ice cream or maybe just going for a walk in the park or something like that.
Things that are pretty boring because it takes the focus off of the date itself and it puts
the focus onto you and onto them and onto the connection between the two of you.
Okay.
Now I know that there's advice out there that says, you know, you should go to, you know,
dates that involve physical activity because that gets the endorphins going and they start
to associate a positive experience with you or something.
So you should go to like laser bowling or something like that.
And I'm telling you that you shouldn't do that.
Okay?
You shouldn't do that because the first thing you want to do when you're dating is figure
out what the other person is like and you can't do that if you're focused more on the
bowling game or on the movie or on the the play on Broadway or whatever it might be,
and it's irrelevant if that person feels good about you or not.
If the two of you actually have nothing in common, if the two of you actually don't get
along well, if the two of you actually don't share values and are incompatible, so you
know, yeah, you can build up those endorphins later on but have at least one boring date
first to see if the two of you actually even like each other.
You know, if you just met each other and it's just like a passing thing or it's like, Oh
hey, I just saw you on the other side of the street and I knew I wanted to come up and
say hi to you.
Otherwise I'd regret it.
So I just wanted to quickly grab your number and see if you'd like to get together for
coffee sometime or something like that.
You obviously haven't gotten to know the person first before you actually had that coffee
date.
And so if you're focusing more on the event of the date, the romantic dinner, the laser
bowling, the movie, the Broadway show or whatever, we are not able to build an actual emotional
connection with that person.
That is not what our recommended.
I want you to focus instead on simply just having an emotional connection by going on
a boring date with that person.
Now the next issue with dating is also the mindset that people have, which makes dating
much harder, much more difficult, much more awkward than it needs to be.
And a lot of people often approach dating similar to a job interview where they want
to pass the job interview, you know, they want to go into the job interview and get
the job right.
And they, they haven't really learned about the job.
They haven't learned about the culture of the company at or what exactly the job entails.
And all that, they just know, you know, maybe a couple paragraphs or something they'd read
from an online posting for the job or whatever it might be.
And it's similar when it comes to dating.
You don't want to go into a date just trying to impress somebody.
I mean obviously it's great if you do, but you don't want to just try to get that person
to like you try to get that person to want to commit to you.
Try to get that person to want to be in a relationship with you until you get to know
them, until you know what their true character is.
Because if you approach things that way, you're, you're worried.
You're kind of walking on egg shells, you're looking for validation that this is this going
well?
Do you like me?
Does this seem like you might want to commit to me?
Does it seem like there might be a date?
Number two, you're so focused on what the next step is that you're not kind of dropping
into the present moment and saying, okay, do we actually like being together?
Yeah, you're attractive.
But aside from being nice to look at, nice to feel, do we actually get along?
Do we actually have anything to talk about?
Do we actually have values that we shared?
Would it make sense for us to even have a second date?
Because if we don't even like each other, why would you want to go on a second date?
Right?
And so a date is, is just as much for you to see if they're a good match for you as
it is for them to see if you're a good match for them.
Much like how I would recommend somebody approach a job interview, which is like, is this job
a good fit for me in addition to am I a good fit for this job?
Are they gonna like me?
Are they gonna want to hire me, but should I want to work for this company as well too?
Right?
So if you can simply adopt those two frames when it comes to dating and seeing it more
as like let's just feel each other out as opposed to looking for validation and also
simply focusing more on the emotional connection through boring dates rather than having these
typical stereotypical kind of dates that kind of put people in a weird frame of mind as
they're going in.
They're like, oh Jeez, I hope this is an awkward.
I hope I can, you know, impress this person to help him dressed.
All right, I hope you know all this stuff, but instead have a date that focuses more
on the connection rather than the event of data.
So I hope that's helped you out and what that being said.
Let's get into our questions from modern love association members this week.
Our first question this week is from Daniel.
Daniel writes in and says, clay, I am still in active no contact and just working on the
advanced relational skills before even thinking of initiating contact with my ex, I noticed
that my attitude is just downright negative when it comes to emotional acceptance, awareness,
and composure.
The very things that I realized that led to the breakup worse, I realized that the kind
of attitude spills on over to how I act with other individuals in a sense where I talk
with a sense of self pity or negativity combined.
No one has said anything, but I've begun to notice this within myself.
What exercise or lessons should I look at to stop the negative feelings towards my ex
or just let go of what has happened to clarify?
What can I do to stop the negative thoughts that happened from the breakup?
Okay, Daniel.
So I think that the first thing to realize here is that yes, you're correct.
This is an emotional acceptance issue because there's part of you that is emotionally resisting
what happened in the past.
There's a part of you that is pushing back against the things that happened between you
and your ex in the past.
You're not really willing to own what happened.
I mean, you know.
Yeah.
I'm not saying own what happened in like, yeah, it's all my fault, but understand that
yes, you did play a role in the breakup, but it's not like you were intentionally going
out of your way to mess things up.
You were doing the best with what you had at the time in that situation.
you know, nobody voluntarily goes out of their way to do less than their best in any given
situation.
So you don't need to hold onto any feelings of, say, regret or guilt or anything like
that because you were doing the best with what you had at the time and yeah, you know,
now maybe the situation is different.
You can understand things differently now and maybe you do have a different understanding
now, but you didn't have that understanding previously that wasn't accessible to you because
you just had a different view of the situation or of the world or of the dynamic between
you and your ex.
Or were you in women in general or whatever it might be.
That's okay.
Our views are always changing and always growing and you can't judge how you were in the past
by how you are now.
It's very painful and very difficult and also very unrealistic.
You know, there's all kinds of mistakes that I've made in the past, you know, in my twenties,
in my teenage years, in my, even early thirties.
Even as recently, as you know, a year or so ago there, there's all kinds of mistakes that
I make all the time throughout my life.
And if I were to continually judge my behaviors in the past by what I know now, then I'm only
going to create suffering.
You have to see your past within the context of the past, which is that at that point in
time, you only had a certain worldview.
You only had a certain understanding of the situation.
Only had a certain understanding of your relationship with your ex or, or whatever it might be.
And that may have grown in.
That may have changed.
But at that time, at that point in time, you had a very particular view and maybe there
are certain things that were resourceful about that view, but, there were probably also things
that, that could have been better.
And the most important thing isn't that you judge yourself in the past based off what
you know now, but did you simply notice that you are growing from the person that you used
to be, that you are starting to see things in a new way that you're starting to expand
your ability to, for example, implement the advanced relational skills in your interpersonal
interactions or in you're, you're starting to grow in your way, that you connect with
others or you're starting to grow in your way that you relate to others.
You know, there, there are all kinds of things that, that I could beat myself up over.
Like for example, my father and I have had, let's just say not the greatest relationship.
And there was a stretch of time where I didn't talk to him for like 20 years.
During that time, I carried around a lot of guilt.
I carried around a lot of shame.
I carried around a lot of pain and agony about that, you know, I wanted to reach out to him,
but just the immensity of all of that guilt and shame and like how do I even start to
have this conversation?
It was, it was too much for me to bear that I just kept kicking that can down the road
for 20 years really.
And eventually it was last year that I actually got back in contact with him.
It did require me to grow as a person and it did require me to change my worldview and
it would be easy for me to look at how simple it was going to get back in touch with him
and just say, you know, gee clay, you're, you're an asshole.
Like you, you, you totally suck.
Why did it take you 20 years to do this?
You're, you're a loser or something like that.
But that's not the mindset that I had during those 20 years.
That led up to that point where I was finally able to do it.
I didn't have that understanding.
I didn't have that emotional capacity, I didn't have all of the things that that allowed me
to be the kind of guy that can get back in touch with his dad.
So I want you to be okay with your past.
Come to terms with your past, make peace with your past because you can't change it.
There's nothing you can do to change it, so you might as well just accept that it happened
and say, okay, if that's the baseline, if that's where I'm at now, if that's what's
led me to where I am right now, where do I want to go?
What can I do from here?
Right?
It's not about fantasizing about what would have happened in some, you know, alternate
reality.
If I could go back in time and not make these mistakes that I made, because if you didn't
make the mistakes that you made, then you wouldn't be where you are now and you wouldn't
have the current understanding that you have now and you would be completely someone else
in a completely different situation.
Right?
But you're a person that's here now and so make peace with your past and embrace it and
accept that the person that you were that did the things that you did in the past doesn't
have to be that the person that you are right now, it doesn't have to be the Daniel that
you are now, and you can always make a new decision to step into a new reality, a new
way of being a new Daniel moving forward.
Okay.
That's always something that you can do moment by moment.
So I hope this helps you out and please keep us updated on how things go moving forward
from here.
Our next question is from Linea.
Linea says, Hi Clay.
Congratulations on your baby girl.
I hope you and your family are doing well.
Me and my ex moved extremely fast and moved in together.
We dated for four months and I met his entire family.
They love me and I grew pretty close to them too.
I eventually moved back home to save money and my ex dumped me for being too needy in
April 2018.
Before I discovered you, I did passive no contact and tried reverse psychology texts
for 32 days.
They worked.
He started calling me, initiating contact more often and then sending me good morning
text again.
Then I found your program online.
A girl tried dating him and I thought that he was interested in her, so I gave him space.
He ended up cutting that relationship off and told me that he liked the conversations
that we have.
Pretty sure it was those advanced relational skills, so he kept talking, but about a month
ago he started pulling away, no calls, not much replies to tax, etc.
I figured this was because of his new job and because his sister was going away to college,
but my anxiety about the situation took over and a couple of days ago I was honest with
him about how I felt.
I asked him if we could eventually try again.
He said if we were to try again, a lot of things would need to change and I need time
because I don't know what I want.
He then went on to say, I don't want to lead you on when I don't know what I want.
I asked him if we could still talk and he said, yeah, I couldn't just stop talking to
you.
I don't know if he's in test drive or riding the dragon.
I just felt like we were in crisis point and then he took a giant step back.
I'm stuck because I'm not sure if I could move on or not.
Some days we connect emotionally through text and other days he barely replies.
Do you think that he is at riding the dragon stage?
Honestly, yeah, I do.
we were supposed to hang out today, but he canceled last minute to help a friend with
something.
People have said that if he doesn't know what he wants, I should have let him go.
I feel empathetic towards him because he's probably scared of our relationship ending
the same way.
Should I continue showing him that he can trust me with advanced relational skills?
P.S thank you for answering my questions on the youtube videos.
In the past it meant a lot like what I was saying.
It does sound like he is at riding the dragon.
You're getting hot and cold behavior from him.
He says he doesn't know what he wants.
He says that he doesn't want to lead you on.
He says that he can't stop talking to you.
These are very big signs that he is at riding the dragon just because there's a lot of confusion
on his end.
Okay, so what I would do is I would.
First of all, you have to look at what you want to do because what you want to do is
most important, okay?
It's more important than anything that I say, but you have to look at what you want to do
and if you want to maintain a connection with him, then what I would say is to stay in contact
with him.
Assuming you were able to have interactions that feel good on an emotional level when
you are in contact with them.
If you're not able to be in contact with him and interactions that feel good, then you
should probably cut contact until you can figure something out, but I would stay in
contact with him and have interactions to feel good on an emotional level and show him
that he can trust you because that's what's going to help move him out of the riding the
dragon stage, because as he starts to put more and more emotional trust into you, he's
going to put more and more a trust in knowing that you're going to bring that consistency
every time the two of you interact with each other through the advanced relational skills.
Okay, and as he starts to do that, he's going to open himself up a little bit more.
He might suddenly know what he wants.
He might suddenly not concerned about leading you on because he's a little bit clearer about
what he wants, etc.
Now I understand that a lot of your friends are saying that you should let him go because
he doesn't know what he wants and you know your, your friends, they, they're trying to
protect you.
They want.
They don't want to see you get hurt, but I am. you know, I also don't want to see you
get hurt either, but I also want to empower you to go after what you want.
I don't want to keep you in some sort of safety bubble where you only go with sure shots and
guaranteed things right, because that's not how you successfully step into life.
In order to successfully step into life, sometimes you have to take a long shot.
Sometimes you have to go against the grain and step out of your comfort zone and take
a risk right, and if that's something that you want to do and if something that you want
is stepping outside of your comfort zone and it would involve taking a risk, then maybe
that's something to consider.
But if you do want to have an emotional connection with him, I would suggest demonstrating to
him that he can't emotionally trust you and that will start to strengthen the connection
between the two of you.
And as that happens, you'll feel less and less hesitant about being emotionally open
with you and connecting with you and possibly even committing to you in the future.
So Llinea, I hope this helps you out and please keep us updated on how things go moving forward
from here.
Our next question is from pa, pa says, hi clay.
Thank you for answering my question.
Two weeks ago, I told you that my ex said to a friend that he was not sure about keeping
in contact with me, but then two days later we talked for almost two hours since then
we had ups and down in our feelings and communications, I asked him a magic, how are you feeling?
Kind of question.
And he never applied until three days later when he initiated for the third time in five
months with a really silly excuse to do so, I now realize that I lose my composure and
made the mistake of, involving my grandmother in the conversation.
It was a special occasion to let them exchange a bit by vocals. she really wants to see him
again and agreed to come to have a dinner with her sometime, but he was uncomfortable
about it and I should be there or not.
Okay.
I don't know what any of that just meant the day after it was his birthday and it was a
bad feeling conversation for the both of us.
I guess I was really sad to not be among the ones who celebrate him and I think that my
energy was wrong when talking with him or maybe I made him feel guilty today.
I shared on a whatsapp group.
We are both in something sad about my cat and he didn't say anything which put me in
damage control mode because our connection feels like it's falling apart more and more
as the week ends.
What I want to ask you about our room for maneuver when it comes to making the kinds
of mIstakes that I've done this week.
I mean even if I try to improve my advanced relational skills, I still feel that I am
too impulsive and to often speak without taking enough time to think what I should do or say.
And then I have to face the consequences.
Now, even if I'm out of anc, I realized that my skills are not good enough to handle this
process without making mistakes.
Is it okay to not be perfect with the advanced relational skills?
Now after I'm back on talking terms, I would like to know if the process is going to be
long because we have to reach a poInt where we stop making mistakes or if mistakes can
still happen along the road if we manage to balance them with good interactions.
Thank you Clay.
Okay.
Yeah.
So we're all gonna make mIstakes when it comes to connecting and relating with others.
It's just part of the territory.
Learning how to connect and relate with others is a lifelong practice and you know, yeah,
we each have our own starting points, our own weaknesses, our own strengths, et cetera.
And we each have our own paths to take as we get better at that.
With that being said, you know, a mistake here and there is not going to be the end
of everything, so to speak, in most cases.
Granted, someone might have a very short string that they're keeping you on or something like
that, and and if you, if you just say the wrong thing, they might just cut you lose
because that's just their personality, but in my experience that is very uncommon.
Okay.
Most people can recover from mistakes that they make from poor choices that they make
a simply by, by tapping into the other person's emotional place and maybe doing something
like an apology or doing something like expressing empathy or doing something where they're showing
how their actions impacted the other person.
Okay, so you say that you're very impulsive and you often say things without having time
to think about what the consequences would be, and this just shows me that it's a present
moment awareness problem because if you're tuned into present moment awareness, you start
to say, okay, well if I were to say this or if I were to do that, it would likely have
this kind of impact.
It would likely have this kind of response.
You know, you can't want to, as one of my mentors used to say, you can't do something
consciously that you know is not going to be resourceful.
The only reason you would do something that's not resourceful is because you were unconscious
of the consequences.
Right?
So if you're saying things that you regret, if you're saying things that backfire on you,
if you're making mistakes, it's because you're somehow unconscious of the impact that it's
going to have on your actions and and your progress towards what you're hoping to create.
So what I would do is I would work more on your present moment awareness.
I would work more on building that skill up, do things like the noticing game, do things
like more mindfulness activities, et cetera.
And I think that'll really help you out.
Okay, pa.
So I hope that helps and please keep us updated on how things go moving forward from here.
Our next question is from Danny.
Danny writes in and says, hi clay.
When I wrote a couple of weeks ago, I had sent my ex a message about getting our dogs
together at the beach and had not heard back last weekend.
She messaged to tell me that her dog max was in poor health and that she was putting him
to sleep the next day so that obviously that weekend wouldn't be good for visiting and
that we would to talk towards the end of the month.
I sent back a message saying how sorry I was that I knew how hard this was for her and
then I was sending lots of hugs her way.
I included a photo of our dogs right before we split.
No response to that, although none was really needed.
A week later I found a couple of videos of the dogs that I thought she might like to
see, so I wrote again saying that I knew she'd probably had a rough week and that I hope
that she was taking good care of herself and sent that along with the videos.
I mentioned at the end that we would chat soon.
No response to that either.
Although again, not necessary.
I guess I did start second guessing this a bit though, that I could have used the initial
email about Max to ask questions and try to get the conversation going and Instead I just
said that I was sorry and that of course we could see each other another time, so I'm
thinking that just checking back in a couple of weeks to see how she did and not asking
to get together.
Maybe just try and get her to talk a bit.
Then maybe a week or two after that, try again for a meetup.
I'm assuming that meeting up with me might be hard when she's already emotionally overloaded
with the loss of her pet.
Do you think my instincts are right here or should I just go ahead and try for a brunch
In a couple of weeks?
The thing that is a little bit concerning is that from what I'm getting from what you've
written here, and maybe I'm not getting this correctly, but what I'm getting from what
you're writing here is that most of your communication with her is revolving around dogs and your
pets and that's a little bit concerning because it, it makes me wonder if you're just keeping
the connection at the surface level and you're not really pulling it down to the emotional
level.
If you're at that surface level where you're just connecting through pets and dogs than
her havIng something happened with one of her dogs, like putting it down to sleep, that's
going to dampen the entire connection that you have with her because you're only connecting
on a single topic.
Okay.
It's important to put down to the emotional level.
It's important to have a little bit more breadth and a little bit more depth when it comes
to your connecting.
okay. so I would try to have some connections with her that, don't really revolve around.
Dogs don't have revolved around videos of dogs, don't revolve around walkIng dogs and
so on and so forth, and I would talk to her about something else.
I would also try to pull the conversation down to an emotional level, not just talking
about the emotions that you feel about things, but talk about the emotions that you feel
as a human being.
Right.
So, again, you might talk about, I don't know where you went this summer vacation and what
was it that made you decide to go there?
What are some other places you might decide to go for another summer vacation?
Why would you want to go to those places?
What's your dream vacation that you've always wanted to go on?
What's an amazing trip that you went on In the past?
How did you feel when you got there?
Did it live up to expectations?
What are other things that you experienced in your life that either didn't live up to?
Expectations are totally exceeded your expectations beyond measure, what sorts of experiences
have you always wanted to have in your life that you think might be a little bit overrated
or do you think might be a little bit underrated?
what are some dreams that you have?
what are some things you've always wanted to try?
What are some thIngs that are on your bucket list?
why are those things on your bucket list, you know, just have conversations like that
and you'll be able to have a much stronger emotional connection because if you only have
one point of connection and that's through, for example, pets, then that connection is
not going to be as strong as if you have many, many, many different types of connection through
many, many different avenues.
Okay.
That's goIng to create a much stronger emotional connection and it's going to bring you a whole
lot closer.
So, um, I would probably strive to have that kind of connection when it comes to your connection
with your ex.
So I hope that helps you out.
danny and please keep us updated on how things go moving forward from here.
Our next question is from Chiang, Chiang writes in and says, hi Clay, I'm a new member and
I'm glad to reach out to you here.
My ex boyfriend had and I had three years together and we used to live together for
two years.
We are an international couple.
He's Swede and I'm Chinese.
We did have conflicts, but he's very good at avoiding arguments and I'm also very careful
with my words so we never had any real fights when we were living together.
I never had a any second thought about our relationship because of any unpleasant time
as I believe this is nothing but normal between any couple.
This year I decided to visit my family from May until August.
He came in summer and we had a one month trip in Asia.
We had both memorable and frustrating times, but I noticed that he is more easily getting
angry than before.
Started to blame me a lot, but we both easily let go of anger, so I never sensed any problem
between us until he brought up the breakup.
a week after the trip ended, I was so shocked that he had so much negative emotions towards
me.
He said his love for me ran out and that he has this doubt of our relationship for months.
As a result, he refuses to accept me going back, continuing living together and trying
to fix the issues.
He said it's tiring to live with me.
In a way I think it makes sense to say those are words that he said out of a bad emotions
during the breakup, but It seems to be very rational of a decision, especially in a month
time.
He said he revisited the decision many times and still believes that it's right.
Do you think it's just emotional connection between us?
It feels to me like he'll never see me as a potential partner again, especially now
that we're living in different countries and have no intersections in life.
Thank you so much.
Okay, Chiang.
So what I would start to do is to understand a little bit more about what actually led
to the breakup.
It seems like this just came out of the blue for you.
So what I would do is I'd look at what led up to the breakup a, what are the disagreements
that the two of you had maybe around the time that the two of you left to go on this trip
to Asia or maybe possibly before then, like what was happening in your relationship?
What were things that maybe he was saying maybe not as overtly as possible, but what
are some signals that he was sending out?
Like, hey, I have this event coming up would really mean a lot if you showed up and then,
you know, maybe you didn't show up because of, I don't know, maybe something came up
or whatever.
Like what were some things that if you look back you could say, oh, okay, I get it, I
wasn't really there for him when he needed me for the important thing.
And so maybe he just doesn't feel that I support him or maybe I always criticize this one aspect
of something that he does or something like that.
So I would start by looking at what actually led up to the breakup now.
I mean, obviously I don't know what led up to the breakup because I only have this a
short description that you sent in, but you know your relationship a whole lot better.
I do.
So I'm going to trust that if you can look back through what happened, you can probably
start to piece together a good idea about what led to that breakup.
Okay.
Once you know that you want to say, okay, is this something that can be fixed?
If it, if it's not something that can be fixed and that that's fine, it's a show stopper
right there.
But if it is something that can be fixed, then that's something that you might want
to start working on by if necessary apologizing to him, using something like the fresh start
technique to really demonstrate that, that, you understand how your actions impacted him
and so on and so forth.
And secondly, you also want to show him, demonstrate to him that you have made actual real changes
in your behavior so that he knows that he's not walking back into the same relationship
that he walked out of in the first place.
So I would start with that, I do believe that it probably is an emotional connection issue
between the two of you and I'm, I'm actually not sure why you think it's not an emotional
connection issue because it sounds a lot like an emotional connection issue, like the two
of you weren't connecting on an emotional level.
There's something going on between the two of you, maybe something that happened while
you were in Asia or maybe it's something that happened before the two of you went on this
trip together and maybe you already booked in or something.
So we just kind of was going through the motions during that trip.
I don't know, but I want you to look back through this and see if you can piece together
at least a decent guess as to why you think he wanted to break up with you.
And I bet it does involve the emotional connection more so than anything else.
And if you'd like to come back and share what you think the reason is, why, he, he broke
up with you.
We can have a discussion about that.
Okay.
But by far, the the main reason why people break up with other people is because of an
issue with the emotional connection.
Okay.
So I hope this helps you out.
Chang, and please keep us updated on how things go moving forward from here.
Okay.
Those have been our questions this week.
Once again, this is Clay with www.ModernLove.Life.
If you've liked this, please go ahead and give us a thumbs up.
Please go ahead and subscribe to us and leave a comment down below letting me know what
you think and also if you'd like to get a little bit more advice or tips and strategies
about how to help you in your specific situation.
Please head on over to relationship inner game.com.
I'll ask you to fill out a simple, painless little survey there.
I just want to know a little bit more about you were at and where you want to go in terms
of your love life.
Are you single?
Are you going through a breakup?
Are you, in a relationship right now?
And where do you want to take things from there?
Once I know a little bit more about you through the simple, painless little survey, I'll send
you some tailored, specific advice and strategies based off of your responses over to you.
So once again, this has been Clay with www.ModernLove.Life and I hope that this has helped you improve
your relationship inner game.
Talk to you next week.
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