Hey guys so I have a really busy week this week which means I don't have time
to do my normal, proper, AfroDaddy setup but I do want to talk about the topic of
this video so I thought instead of doing it at my house like I normally do, we could
just talk about these things as I go throughout my day if that's okay with
you so look I just did the school drop off
the boys are happy, their classes have just started which means it's now time
for me to go to work are you gonna come with me? Is that cool?
Alright, let's go.
Okay cool, so here's the thing:
A lot of my friends have
been having babies or have announced that they're about to become dads and
that is very exciting it's like babies everywhere but I have noticed something
really disturbing a lot of my friends have put out an announcement saying hey don't
come by unannounced once the baby arrives, don't pick up the baby if you
are there with us and definitely do not kiss the baby... but that's not the disturbing thing.
Okay so I'm at my office and there's always a lot of noise
because Ish over there is in busy he's doing some gardening early on
the hadedas are going nuts
So when I get in to the office at like 9,
it's just me and Kolosa.
She's cleaning so I better not disturb her. She get's upset if I get in her way.
Which means I have time for a quick cup of coffee outside.
So the thing that I find really disturbing is actually how people have responded to
those announcements so a lot of people have said things like "Just try and stop
me" or "You best believe I'm gonna kiss that baby"
What's going on people?
that's still hot.
So, I get it. You think those parental requests are super crazy but
they're still the parents, surely they have a right to decide how their child
can be treated especially in the first critical few weeks and now you're trying
to like insert yourself into this story
It's a bit weird, isn't it?
And I know what you're thinking:
"Where the hell does Terence work?"
Well, in a little bit of paradise
I'm quite lucky I'm not gonna lie this place is awesome
But you might also be thinking "Hey, you know this child's really important to me too...
He might be my grand son or my grand daughter or a niece or nephew or could
be a child of a very close friend of mine I'm involved in the story I'm part
of the community surely I get some rights too?"
And the answer that is, legally: No you don't
And in any other way: No you don't.
I mean guys we know that parent is hard enough without having other people
second-guess every decision you got to make I mean
let's not make things more confusing for these new parents
still Hot
Those parents do actually have a really good point because our
our mouths are really dirty, like, there covered in germs and they're taking those
illnesses and putting them on a baby that might have a very low immune system
you can actually make the baby really sick and that's a very big thing for a
new parent think about remember they're at their most anxious
Okay so it's after
lunchtime so time for another cup of coffee.
So earlier today I asked you guys on social media what you thought
about the idea of parents telling people to not kiss their babies or hold their babies
and overwhelmingly almost everyone other than like one person agreed that if a
parents don't want you to kiss their baby you shouldn't kiss their baby
And a lot of them had the exact same reasons
because there's disease and you can make baby
really sick and you want to start teach the baby about consent very early on
those are all good reasons but also I think we want to make sure that parents
feel as in control as they can be right like we want to make sure that they know
that they're in charge and they are the parents cause I mean let's face it
people go through a lot to get a baby whether it's physically growing the baby
in your womb for nine months or going through paperwork or helping your wife
or partner through everything that happens through pregnancy there's
there's a lot of anticipation and anxiety and physical pain that happens
with getting a baby getting a new baby in the family and it's kind of weird
that people who didn't go through any of that for this new life to arrive in the
family to make demands, right, but doesn't seem to make a lot of sense
That being said though there is one other point of view I think we have to consider but I
get back to work so...chat later!
Okay, workday is done and now
it's time to leave the office and pick up the boys
because that's the kind of day I have
Okay so we finally all home, say hi boys! Boys: Hi!
The Kid: We just already mowed the lawnmower...
so the grass is all short.
AfroDaddy: that's right. So the first thing we did when we came home was cut the grass and do some
gardening because we want to make sure our garden looks not so pretty yeah we're
getting there but the thing that I think we need to
start thinking about is also what does it mean to parent in a community right?
Boy2.0: Dad, can I talk?
AD: What do you want to say?
Boy2.0: I made a fire.
AD: Where did you make a fire?
Boy2.0: In my sand pit. But you can't go near it or else you'll get burned.
AD: Is it an imaginary fire?
Boy2.0: No, it's a normal fire.
AD: Okay we're gonna need a check on that so here's the
Yeah, so, those guys quite disruptive anyway what I want to say is
that we really have to think about what it means to parent in a community right?
Because if you're going to alienate everyone by saying no one could hold my
child no one can kiss my child nobody even look at my child then you can't
really expect them to help you with you...
Yes Eli? Say Hi
Boy2.0: Hi. We have a trampoline, and a goal post and a lawnmower...
AD: We've got lots of cool stuff in our in our garden hey?
Can I finish talking to the people?
So what is my point? I think two points number one respect
the parents' wishes if they say I don't want people doing X my baby don't do
that thing to their baby but point number two is that if you are a new
parent the people who are most excited to kiss your baby and hold your baby and
in fact if your baby are the same people that are going to be helping you when
you need it most so you don't want to push them away too much so maybe be a
bit nicer about the way you tell people "Hey, don't touch that child!"
Show the people how you jump, Eli!
Jump around, jump around, jump jump let's see
let's see it let's see your skills
I guess if you're not sure you should just
ask the parents if you don't know if they are okay with you kissing their
baby or holding a baby or throwing their baby in the air, ask them and respect
whatever the answer is
Boy2.0: Dad, what's this trampoline made of?
AD: It's made out of trampoline things
Thank you so much for
watching this very disjointed video, the next one will resume with normal programming...
Sigh. It's been a crazy, crazy week.
Boy2.0: Dad, I want to show them this trick!
AD: Show the trick...
Was...was that the trick?
Okay say bye!
Boy2.0: Bye!
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