What's up guys?
This is KreativeVein and today we'll be going over how to calm yourself down.
For me, this is extremely important as I'm the type of guy that gets into fights often,
both verbally and physically.
While I still get into fights from time to time, I can now control myself to where I
know which fights I will fight, the ones that benefit me, and to know the fights that I
shouldn't fight, the ones that would get me suspended from school, lose my social connections,
or harm my family.
So we'll be going through 4 tips to control yourself, all of these have worked for me
and I'll give you some brief examples of them working and when I should have used them.
Before we get into it, be sure to smash that like button like you'll be smashing your calmness?
Yeah that doesn't fit.
And subscribe if you haven't already.
Step 1: Exercise
My father always told me this.
While my grandfather was a very successful man, he and his son, or my dad, never got
along well as they were rarely around each other.
And when my grandpa was around, he would criticize my dad and they'd get into fights.
Instead of being angry and lashing out back, he would go outside and just run.
He was one of the better track athletes in his school and instead of wasting his time
sulking around, after running he would go to the park and just chill with his friends
instead.
Similar with me, I remember one time I was throwing all my shit against the wall because
I felt anger, and then my dad told me how childish that was and that I could just workout
instead.
I would punch a heavy bag that I had from boxing or just lift.
It's not best to only exercise due to anger, as the point isn't to exercise to get back
at others but to improve yourself, but it does turn your energy into something positive
that will help you.
Step 2: Realize That It's Not Personal
This is kind of just a concept that you need to make a habit of telling yourself, but when
people get mad at you, it's normally due to their own insecurities, someone else getting
mad at them and they want to release it onto someone else, or something similar to that.
My own father has never made me extremely angry, but sometimes other family members
will...
I guess, test me in a way where if I'm improving myself by sleeping earlier to wake up early
to workout, they'll make some underhand comment about how my style of life is backwards and
retarded.
The first time this happened I punched the shit out of the wall and yelled, but was it
worth it?
Nope, I couldn't sleep after that and the day after I was groggy as fuck.
Instead, just realize that the person that said that to me, while family, is lazy as
hell and whenever I go to sleep early, they realize that I'm making improvements that
they aren't, and they want to rationalize it.
Don't ruin yourself.
Understand that you are the first person in your life that matters.
Don't play into their games.
Even in school I see some people calling other students "try-hards," as if trying hard in
life is a bad thing.
Obviously don't make it seem like you put in too much work, learned that from intuition
and the 48 Laws of Power, but in reality do put in work.
Step 3: Breathe and Stay Silent
I'm not telling you to meditate here, but take a few seconds to breathe.
If it's in front of other people and you don't want to cause a scene, just act natural but
take some deeper breaths and just keep quiet.
You'll most likely want to comeback at them with something, but if you're angry most of
the time you'll end up looking like a joke.
If you can remain calm and just let the other person make a few jokes about you and just
laugh it off, that's alright.
Or, if the jab is very personal and you should respond, then once again, remain calm and
just explain to them that it's pretty immature.
Obviously calibrate this to your situation as if this is at school I would sometimes
just fight the person, but in a professional setting don't lose your job.
Breathe and reply calmly, or if possible, just don't say anything.
When my mother was getting angry at me for no reason other than that she had to make
dinner that day (I'm in high school), instead of attacking her again, I just set the table,
and ate in silence.
After about 5 minutes of her rambling through emotions, she calmed down and we ate normally.
Step 4: Leave the Situation
Once again almost everything is based on situation.
There are times where you should stand your ground and not just leave the room.
However, I know that if I stay somewhere and I don't calm myself down enough, it's best
that I just leave for a few minutes before I hurt someone.
I've burned many bridges by not just going to the bathroom and clearing my mind by breathing
but rather by punching that person in the face in front of other kids.
Everyone takes jokes at times, so if this is the one day out of the month where you
get roasted by your friends, don't go super saiyan.
But, if people are messing with you daily and it's not you but rather them that pick
on you for your race, where you come from, or anything else, you should leave the company
or social group.
It's not worth settling somewhere where the people just generally do not like you.
And unless you have a major goal and this is just a stepping stone that you will get
through in a year or so, it's not worth it mentally.
There are many other social groups that won't make you the butt of the joke and many places
where you can work where people accept you.
Or you could even just be self-employed and work in a work-space with other entrepreneurs.
That's all the steps for today, step 1: use the energy to work out, step 2: realize that
it isn't personal, step 3: breathe and use silence, and step 4: leave the situation (both
short term and possibly long term).
If you have any other tips please let me know in the comments down below, and subscribe
if you haven't already, KreativeVein, peace.
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