Elite Facts Presents
7 CRAPPY Kickstarters That Shouldn't Exist!
7.
-Coleco Chameleon Who here is old enough to remember the Colecovision?
Now take a seat kids, Because back in the day THIS is what video games were.
Yeah, pretty right?
Yeah not going to lie, it was pretty much the stone age back in those days but really
graphics didn't matter as long as the challenge was there.
Well since those days, Coleco went bust in 1988 and faded into obscurity.
However in recent years, The name Coleco was loaned out to a failed kickstarter experiment
known as the Coleco Chameleon (Which in turn was previously known as the Retro VGS Console).
This console was supposed to bring back the classic colecovision days to a new mainstream
audience (Very similar to what Nintendo have been doing with the NES and SNES mini consoles).
Unfortunately this product was a half baked attempt at grabbing you cash with nostalgia
being it's main selling point.
The console itself reused the shell of the Atari Jaguar and the motherboard of the Super
Nintendo Entertainment system.
When they had one of these consoles on display during (Insert convention name here) the console
was using SNES controllers and mains support and the back of the system was held together
with cheap glue and tape.
Because of the backlash, The coleco name was stripped off the product by the owners of
said name.
6.
-Illumibowl Night Light Quite possibly one of the strangest items
on this list.
Now, okay, it's not the worst, but it is completely pointless.
You've got to admit that.
So the Illumibowl Night Light is a nightlight that is designed to sit around the rim of
your toilet bowl and illuminate the interior of the bowl itself.
Now why is this useless?
Well for starters, Every bathroom has a light…..And that's all the reason you need to no bother
with this product..
And besides, do you really want to see whatever's in the toilet illuminated?
I didn't think so!
5.
-Smart Spinner : The Most Unique and Versatile Fidget Spinner
When is this fad ever going to die out.
Sure it's not as big as it was say 4 months ago, however you can't deny that these things
are still everywhere!
Now this kickstarter campaign.
We don't even need to go into detail on this one.
Why?
Because it's just an oddly shaped fidget spinner that functions like any other fidget
spinner but it has LED lights because why not?
That's how you know a product is cheap.
When they start plastering LED lights all over it then you should know to stay away
from that particular product.
But yeah….It's just a run of the mill fidget spinner with lights.
Moving on...
4.
-Anastasia - The Sequel to Breaking Bad Why do people feel the need to ruin something
that ends on a high note.
Now fan films are fine as it doesn't interfere with the actual show and story, However this
is possibly one of the most asinine attempts at reviving a much beloved show that wrapped
up it's final season on such a good note.
So let's be honest here.
The Season Finale of Breaking Bad was maybe a little bit too rushed, However the actual
episode itself still managed to deliver us a perfect send off (don't worry i won't
go into any REAL spoilers).
It wrapped everything up nicely and we got a very satisfying ending.
Well here comes one person who simply can't leave the show be.
Lawrence Shepherd started up a kickstarter campaign as an attempt to fund his proposed
sequel that would star Guns n Roses guitarist, Slash and Val Kilmer as U.S Marshals (By the
way, Neither of them were actually tied to this project.
This was the creators preferred casting choice).
Now i'll be the first to admit that Lawrence Shepherd does go into a lot of detail with
his kickstarter and some of the ideas for the show, So the planning is there.
Not to mention some of his ideas are pretty interesting, however, He shouldn't have
tried shoehorning it into Breaking Bad's story.
3.
-Mighty Number 9 Oh man, This one certainly had backers crying
like an anime fan on prom night.
So unlike most projects on this list, Mighty Number 9 was actually a great idea that played
off of everyone's nostalgia.
On paper sounded absolutely incredible.
It was built to be the spiritual successor to the much beloved capcom series from the
80s and 90s, Mega Man.
The project was helmed by the original creator himself, Keiji Inafune and was looking to
hit $900.000 dollars before the end of the campaign.
The campaign ended up surpassing the intended goal and ended up hitting 3.8 million dollars
by the time the campaign closed.
This allowed for Comcept (The game's developers) to port the game to pretty much every console
available at the time.
Sounds like a success story right?
Well unfortunately, it seems like the second the kickstarter campaign ended, things went
south.
Concept attempted to launch yet another Kickstarter campaign for a spin off title called "Red
Ash: The Indelible Legend".
You know?
Because it's a good idea to start another kickstarter for a different project while
you're still developing the game from the previous project.
Eventually, after multiple developmental delays and a horrific advertising campaign, Mighty
Number 9 was released on June 21st 2016 in the Japan and the United States to mixed reviews.
Many reviewers noted that the game was very unpolished as it graphically looked nothing
like the original concept art (Which in all fairness, is kind of a pointless argument
to have.
However the graphics did look like something you'd expect from a platformer back in 2003).
Not to mention the gameplay itself was a broken heap of a mess.
Honestly, It's a shame that this project was a failure.
It seemed like all the stars had aligned for this project to be a sure fire hit.
2.
Bottle Openers.
Bottle Openers everywhere Having a bottle opener on your keychain is
without a doubt one of the most useful things to have.
You never know when you're going to crack a cold one open.
However if you go on kickstarter and type in Bottle opener as a keyword, You will see
that there's at least 400 results in regards to bottle opener kickstarters.
You have things like:
-Javi-X Creative Opener: Open bottle like a Ninja!:
-The Microtap (A mini bottle opener….There's like 5 of these)
-Beertop Delta - Spinning Bottle Opener which is pretty much a fidget spinner with a bottle
opener….again there's like 5 of these
-BeerBro - The Best Bottle Opener In the World.
Period
-The Hook - Indestructible Titanium Wayfarer Sunglasses that has a bottle opener molded
into it
-Space Needle Bottle Opener: which is a small display piece of seattle where the space needle
doubles as a bottle opener
-TheMiK | The Slimmest Smartphone Stand | EDC Bottle Opener
-Beer Ranger Badge with bottle opener attached
-KeyPop - Turn Any Key Into A Bottle Opener!
Just to name a few!
Like wow!
If it has space, chuck a bottle opener on it!
Why not?
Hey if you're selling a bottle opener, Why not include another bottle opener with it?
Everyone is doing it on kickstarter so why not!
1.
-Potato Salad and Many Other The Pointless Campaigns
Now, we're just going to bundle all of these into one section because really this subject
could honestly be a list of it's own.
In fact it could be a series of lists.
That's how many of these damn things exist.
Now this whole trend became popular thanks to the infamous Potato Salad Kickstarter in
which 1 person by the name of Zack "Danger" Brown (Great name by the way) Asked for only
$10 so he could make a bowl of Potato Salad with as description saying "Basically I'm
just making potato salad.
I haven't decided what kind yet.".
He also included stretch goals such as throwing a pizza party when hitting 75 bucks, making
2 different bowls of potato salad for hitting 100 bucks, making a third bowl for hitting
350 and filming a livestream of him making the potato salad and recording a thank you
video for hitting 1000 bucks and 1200 bucks respectively.
Seems like a funny idea for a kickstarter.
Well this project made a whopping $55,492!
All of this because one man wanted 10 dollars to make potato salad.
Brilliant!
Unfortunately people decided to try this method themselves by asking for money to do ridiculous
things such as filling an entire studio with 4 tons of gravel, A graphic design student
wanting to raise $8 for a chicken burrito from Chipotle, and No Raisin Trail mix just
to name a few.
And believe me, THERE'S TONS MORE OF THESE!
And that's our list?
Did we miss any out?
What other mad crowdfunding projects have you seen?
Let us know in the comments below!
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