hi guys, ashkirwan.com.au and in
this video I'm going to give you one of
my weight loss stories from in the
journey of losing 50 kilos over the last
eight years however this story of 10
years ago and it was when I was working
on Roy Hill of cattle station 125 kilos
and have been pretty much i would say
ostracize about every person i've known
in my family my peer group everything
although i went through a large level of
mental health and choose to get to that
point and the bigger picture of that was
that a lot of people just couldn't stand
by and watch what was going on in my
world so chronic down myself desert and
searching in writing and the desert of
all things you do when you're under 25
kilos in extremely overweight working on
a cattle station in 45 degree heat
however did his story like i was doing
forums that's driving around about
400-500 collars a day starting out water
boards to make sure that the the animals
that livestock cattle cows and the balls
on the cattle station of a million
anchors actually had water from day to
day to survive because in the desert in
Australia the one thing that keeps
animals flourishing and ain't growing is
the fact that they've got fresh water to
drink itches a lot idols out to walk
great distances nor to get food not
likely though and 125 kilos I think I
kind of had a little bit of cushion
hello and the stories on when they had
stopped and rocked up on site there's me
I bust the need for being an idiot down
on a creek streaming overweight 19 with
the land cruiser music tunes cranking
with the lights over the creek dancing
like an idiot I've rolled mini and I end
up in crutches a lot for months and as
much as I can mark about analysis it was
not nice at the time like I didn't have
health insurance but didn't have anyone
to call me a cheap and to be honest with
you what mom and dad was just like yeah
mom wasn't even talking to data at the
time but that mr. cycle we want me to do
about you looking time for any new with
it and so there's a lot of this cost
unions are going on in the back of my
life and this was a lot of the emotional
turmoil showed off me today that quarter
of this may be bounced over because when
the headstock and rocked up he sees
meeting is over a dude on crutches
doable for runs and 30s in his right
what do you are in fact rah rah rah and
then from that on my nickname become too
bad because for obvious reasons that I
liked any porridge in the morning which
extreme amounts of honey on it and so me
and had Stockman had court volatile
relation to that point like you imagined
or approaches Australia roadway to Chloe
got this one what I have another being
I'm a cigarette quite of mentality not
really even ship is it's our level of
emotional I marry that we've built up to
be how to deal with people to give a
shit about how we look and how we are
and so we've created this a lot of
overweight straight man ever created a
greater level of abundant week in order
to counteract anybody smart comments and
actions about her obesity and so that
was very much mean like us very much
more emotional armory was sent really
high because you really have a strong
connection my life I really had nothing
to lose good four months Mimi had
Stockbridge's had his head bashing
relationships where him and soccer golf
to a mustering I'd gone through the ball
runs and then that was its cause every
time is the meeting in the middle of his
light jet button has forward arguments
the whole lot and then you know to be
honest it was probably the lowest point
of my my life actually you know and it's
funny for me now because that guy's
become a really good friend of mine oh
these and a write-up great role model
but a torn he was a business a lot ever
met and because I had nothing to go back
to I had nothing to run for all I had
nothing run tues I was just there that
was me so I was like fuck you mate right
we're going to go out its guns blazing
you so you go this way things go that
way I've got nothing to lose anyway so
we had a love-hate relationship where he
would find as many ways pull the living
piss out of me and make me feel bad
about myself from one obesity and what
I'm more than capable of doing
over time I just watch this guy you know
because it wasn't any of all right and
go there wasn't any worse I could feel
about myself I was pretty much bad and
so nobody can drag many Louis I really
didn't give a shit so it just becomes
fun to actually roll discover on this
guy back across the seabed of his /
frappe anytime I could all those a lot
sharper the oils so being overweight not
bad not stand up I sort of stood back in
sports ago after a long period of time
and you know it was a very arrogant
narcissistic like a real desert rat
hardened Ozzy bike and he can match it
like a lot of bushings are a lot of
Desert Rats are you know yeah like which
is God from longtime like he had a lot
of workers come and go because he was
just total on and I'd Thailand I'd get
dusted up by a few animals it's not an
easy job life some of those scrubs are
up around a time and then never been
caught before when they come in when you
finally get me to the odds by helicopter
wat buggy and I thought act like they
just won't warn you and guide you and
main just want to destroy you and try
and get back entity and it's not a great
thing against us as they died life in
court troops a lot of fun and a lot of
told them there's a lot of campus and
emotions flying flat out because that's
difference between people living in
striving and thriving or dying very
easily down a desert it can think and go
pear-shaped and terribly wrong very
quickly so it's why I love likes out
they are very sharp and very direct and
very straight up and down in a certain
industry it's a cutthroat industry where
you know it's not made a great industry
to their car or a lot of times that's
what a lot of these guys pretty brutal
what goes on out there in the desert
denouement i mean i remember i watch the
squat for months gastric workers and one
night we all go loses the first want to
go on the Boosters could be an ab
internet we not find coverage in that TV
we never 80 in that contact the outside
world up then the telstra pay slips
where you can log in through an external
phone and pay by direct debit to call
out so it really walk on the wild west
at that stage nine and God come garlic
by gone through about 21 blokes one
light head stopping I'll Steve I decided
he'd come out and get on the business
and drink a few beers and things got
pretty rowdy or once again he got pretty
nice 60g after you know darkman beers or
solid I've decided to give another
mouthful sitting around the fire at
midnight you know I 100 also 120 kilos
of time the only really soft sand so I
added that Thomas it ran far of an
evening and enjoying that and then yes
different hours revered as it you know
taking getting my substance and
substance from life from the little
things like the pitches the picturesque
scenery of the desert there's random
spray animals in say running around the
place of dal dhokli the dingoes the
camels for horses the snakes or lizards
the budget the Eagles but as much as you
think the desert is dead lit which it is
there so much about a lot either I'll
come on cook took great pleasure Eden
take that stuff you don't you have a
diploma upon our being our lane the
nine-minute of know possibly by fides
knowing to go anyway might as well found
manage orbit for that you know this why
not going to sit down and without that
doesn't is it it's almost better lolz i
could be but was enjoying that i only
just started ripping into me in the
middle of night hasta psychic you know
on I talk to me like that I was like not
your problem is and I proceeded to give
this broken their fault and it wasn't
just being nasty i was actually
constructing about because i've washed
at the site on because you wanted to be
communicated with its going yet to be
very direct about we said and made a
point which is our t seem like you to
speak up or spread behold apiece you
might do with goods we get out on me
like that was malice april straight down
the line spider spider BAM and it's live
on after him but was actually a cult of
cartman I thought the speech up and put
the cards on the table just like you'd
asked for so long is 925 hundred twenty
kilos at that time could stand on one
leg could even straight the second need
without having the crutches on and no
giving this bloke advanced or at
midnight so clearly just what the
flawlessly 15 times
at that stage that I remember just
looking at me like he for real and all
the rest of the lad sit around the fire
looking at me right BRB Hamid another
one stop me I haven't done what nobody
government CFO can go and none me and
this had stopped and had an ID window
went for about ten minutes flat out is
firing back aboard each other pin pin
pin pin pin detail detail detail spades
spades bone until the end he gets up and
he walks around at that time I had an
Akubra heart that I I'd we're quite
really don't have it on sit by Lauren
you know a little bit of this bit of
smile who I could and then he gets up
and you walk for everybody knows you
want fight da poo in it you think you're
a man you get up and forth like a min I
remember looking over shoulder bit like
you for real right with me 120 kilos
make I can't even stand up on two feet
on one crutches and you want to have a
fight with me and you're supposed to be
the leader of this shaman or have a look
at yourself man you're being an idiot
Gordon City indicate you the one who
said if anyone's got anything to say to
speak up or forever hold your peace all
I'm doing is actually speaking up I'm
over hope forever holding my pee so you
just sit down and keep talkin like you
promiscuous and keep saying that
everyone should speak up or forever all
their patience you never let me speak up
and just shut your fuckin mouth you old
bastard that my friend is probably one
of the three most glorified moments with
my B's life actually taking my power
back and say no you will respect me as a
sim thing because i know why i am and i
am no where i am not the other day
you'll still respect me as human being
if i'm going to be able to be allowed to
have a voice i'm going to use it in here
you go you can have it continue to keep
given to it well after midnight well
after quite a number of is and what i
would like to share with you in this way
or story is not even though that it's
very eco derivative storage for me is
not the idea of boosting our ain't going
to make our point but to bitch instruct
you about how we create interactions of
people and kids being obesity regional
people who put us down as very easy for
people
two main just to you Lester worthy or
feel fucking that we're not an
experience of fight back to that and
it's are easy to be very sharp tongue to
the equal level but not constructive of
us never ever going to get you out of
anywhere and it's not going to break you
into any wins or get you anywhere
substantial wine being really smart
driven about things so the thing but
about that moment that was great for me
so I was very constructive about what I
said to him even that was after a couple
of cartons vydor I had thought about
what I would say to him for a long time
and it sort of just roll up the tunnel
right then the next day I had got up and
you know you is pissed off because I'm
out in front of all the boys but after
that we become become really good mates
because like I had the greech and I had
the gumption stand-ups on the outside
the grid the gumption to stand up for
myself so what that one owner gave me
was a guiding my self-worth they taught
me to value myself and that's probably
the biggest lesson I've had to maintain
in order to maintain my weight loss by
changing my lifestyle to be more like a
wonder I had to raise my self worth
because up until that point but just let
people pull the piss outta me I just let
them run me through the ground and
fucking destroyed me that was in that
one moment that I stood up for myself
and did no this is not how this story is
going to fuck it end I'm taking control
of this shit and I'm fucking not going
to be treated like that no more fuck you
that I actually started to see a part
out that avicii apart out of having a
busted knee and a really struggle
through life it's what I really got my
fight back in here in my heart and my
guts and just went yet I'm taking this
back because I just let myself be pushed
around so much in my life that I just
didn't even know how to function
correctly in the vicinity of the
community so within that moment I'll
just like you know what just find my
sponsor and that is probably the best
tip I can give you for this
his weight-loss success tour is that
when you take your power back you give
you a chance give yourself a chance to
win give a chat and yourself permission
to create your own secret story and
start your own teach that story because
on the journey of your own life like you
hold the pen you hold the paper you
write the end of your story and don't
ever give in you know that point I've
given in odd or do you like accepted
losing for the rest of my life and
that's so just only 30 years of age and
you know it's in that moment that big
argument that I was like I don't spend
the rest of my life being treated like
this I don't know and there was a really
it was really humbling moment for me
after I really calm down when I look at
it now you know there's a lot of ego
reading that story it was like too many
local book around the campfire right by
you I become a good friend of mine for a
reason killers to something in that I
was willing to communicate not
completely just running through the mind
and degrading even though that was
coming the other way for six months I
mean not going overboard when I had that
opportunity or won his respect of one
his friendship because of what I stood
for that exact moment because he knew
any moment we can change our emotional
state and we can be empowered to move
towards something that's more conducive
of who we are as an expression about
this that's how we create success
stories you weight loss that's how we
get to that goal weight that's how is
that goals is by giving ourselves
permission to be yourself on any given
moment and be constructed about you know
believe in yourself believe the you are
you are a greater success story in your
weight loss journey in whatever ill
whatever that looks like you get out
there believe in you
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