He's our friend, he's Tyler!
Your best black friend, so he's the best!
I wouldn't trade him for anyone
because black friends are the exception.
He smiles like Richard Pryor, so sit down.
He's our friend.
He's Tyler!
He's our friend.
He's Tyler!
He's our friend, he's Tyler!
Hey guys!
What's up?
I'm here with my two friends from Spain
and we're talking about sex and the
differences between the United States and Spain.
Hey girls, how are you?
Hey Tyler! Hey Kristo! Happy Valentine's Day!
Hey Tyler! Hey Xio! How are you?
Everything's good here.
Valentine's Day? How boring!
It's pretty ironic that we have this podcast on this month
because February is the month of love.
It's capitalism month.
Wasting a ton of money on really expensive dinners,
really expensive flowers and really expensive chocolates.
It's capitalism month.
The hetero-patriarchy love or just love?
It's only in the United States or do you think it's also in Spain?
I believe it's both places, isn't it?
I believe we celebrate it the same way in both countries.
I can't see any differences on this issue.
Perhaps the people are more romantic here than there?
I can point that out.
I believe it has grown since we have social media
because Valentine's Day is kind of like a show.
And there's many "cute things" around it so people want to pretend and be part of the hashtags.
I'm not sure how many people really celebrate it as a love sacrament.
Okay. I would like to ask you:
Tyler, do you celebrate Valentine's Day, or would you like to celebrate it? Kristo?
No, because I don't have any girlfriend at this moment.
No, because I'm not that romantic and I'm kind of lazy about it.
It's too baroque. Sloth!
No, no. I don't celebrate it. How sloth!
No, no. It's a waste of money.
Too much. No, no.
I agree with Kristo. I don't celebrate it.
I mean.
I believe back in high school it was more like:
"Oh my god! Valentine's Day!".
Today, who cares? I don't.
It's a waste of money for no reason.
Whoever loves you, loves you every day.
For my case, it's been a while since I had a valentine for a girl.
I was in High School, I believe, for a 14 year old girl.
But unfortunately, the girl is not my girlfriend.
Well, you're still young. Soon you will not care anymore.
All the symbols linked to Valentine's Day doesn't move me.
I don't like to get "dead flowers".
I prefer plant pots with roots that'll grow beautiful and not on Valentine's Day
but any other day of the year.
Love signs must be throughout the year, not just a specific date.
Still, I respect whoever celebrates it but to me is fake, so I don't like it.
I agree with Kristo. I don't think we need a month for love.
In fact, I believe that love should be a whole year thing.
Not only a month.
And I believe in other parts of the world, there's various forms of this month.
For example, in Japan they have a month called White Day, I believe. White Day:
where Japanese women celebrate their men.
In the end, Japan does the same thing but our tradition is men giving gifts to women.
It's women who give gifts to the men.
But it is the same thing.
So, tell us Tyler: Are you more American or more African?
Thank god social justice warriors aren't listening.
I'm more African. In fact, I'm more like 65%.
For those that don't know the backstory,
it would be nice to explain this
because it is kind of too specific and we want to know what are you talking about.
Okay.
I call Tyler "65%" because he's not a super dark black person. He is like dark chocolate. 65% dark.
Our audios are being too short, and people doesn't like it.
Xiomara had made some test to people talking about...
asking about sexual things to American vs Spaniards, and I think it will bring up some good points that can impress us.
I would begin with it. I know I'm not the host, but this is who I am.
I mean, I like to meddle and we need rhythm.
Rhythm, rhythm.
Xiomara, what do you have in there? I know it has quality.
Well, I picked up 25 Spanish guys and 25 American guys. Same with the girls.
And yeah, we can get pretty interesting conclusions.
For example, the average age for men to lose their virginity, well, men and women in the United States, is 17.
An average age.
Which makes sense with the fact that they prefer to have sex with people in their same age.
However, in Spain the average age for men is 16 while women is 14.
When asked about the age of their sexual partner,
they say that it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter if they're younger, same age or older.
It maybe a conservative reason more than any other.
It's true that in Spain, there's no bias when it comes to choosing a sexual partner.
I mean age bias.
A young guy can feel attracted for what is called a MILF.
An older man for a young lady. And the other way around: a girl for a mature man.
We don't have that much taboo when it comes to the age, except for gerontophilia or others.
Other sexual attractions more twisted that I don't even want to mention.
Paraphilia, basically.
I can't speak for all Americans but personally I think if one is younger than a person who's more older,
personally, the young person doesn't have that much experience,
doesn't have a lot of maturity,
doesn't have a lot things. For example: a house or money
So, I believe if one of them is younger, they can't have that much experience with things like that.
It doesn't matter, Tyler. We call that a "Toy Boy".
I mean, he may not have that experience in bed, but has the strength and the energy.
So, if you're older than him, you can guide him into whatever you want, and he'll be strong enough to do it.
We used to call them "Little Yogurt"
which is the namesake for "Lolita" but for males.
The innocence of the man plus the physical strength, the fresh of the youth, that halo...
that naivety has a huge erotism.
That's probably why it is irrelevant neither for women or men to have sex relations with a younger person
who has no place for sex or previous experience.
It doesn't matter. The erotic point is exactly that: the missing of experience.
Another question was: where did you learn about sex?
And, if they were interested in sexual games, not just the sex act, like to wear costumes, sadomasochism, sexual toys.
The average American learned what they know at school, and it was a pretty basic education: how to use a condom and things like that.
Therefore, it makes sense when I asked them about sexual games, the majority didn't like the idea.
Boys and girls.
However, in Spain, many of us learned about it on TV or magazines we had.
They were pretty explicit talking about masturbation, sexual games, sexual toys and others.
So, Spaniards in general are ready for anything: wearing costumes, trying new things, playing with toys.
I totally agree with you.
We are from the same generation and we have experienced kind of the same sexual awakening.
In my case, talking about sex with my parents was pretty uncomfortable.
My parents tried but I avoided it.
I was shy.
Also, TV and movies. Most of the movies from 70s, 80s, 90s were unchaste.
So, even as a minor, it made it easy to see any sexual scene.
And most of the magazines, which I think it was blameworthy, like Vale, Super Pop...
-the biggest was Vale- were teaching about sex to a part of the population who were young girls, too young: they weren't even teenagers.
They were being hypersexualized, insisting constantly that they had to lose their virginity, techniques to give more pleasure.
The pressure with the orgasm. And they may not be too specific about how you know you have had an orgasm,
or how does it feel when you have one.
But you know, in our generation,
these type of magazines weren't giving the best messages because let's say that girls, for example, in my situation,
I hadn't spoken with other people about sex yet, and those magazines were the only option.
And those magazines were pushing you into have sex.
You had to fuck, and fuck and fuck.
So, being that young, it wasn't so good.
It's funny that you have many magazines and TV shows about sex for young kids
because it isn't common to have those things in here.
For example, if you want to see any part of a girl, like tits, it's possible to have various movieswith many older people.
For example: Playboy.
It's an example of this but we don't have TV shows for young kids in here.
And we don't have magazines with sex acts.
Oh my god.
I believe we seen all the possible positions through Vale magazine.
And naked people all the time. Actually, I think it was through Vale magazine where I saw Brad Pitt naked!
Also, it had posters for you to hang them at your bedroom walls.
It was a different way to understand the female body and sex than it was for the boys.
They had their own erotic magazines too: from their fathers or bought by many at the bookstore.
And that made a feeling of camaraderie, a union between guys.
Between them, they were more open minded, and used to buy porn magazines.
But magazines designed for us had a content more esthetic/romantic
while at the same time they were trying to teach us -wrongly- how to have sexual relations when you're that young.
So, I think they should be more careful about that because that info, for such young and impressionable girls,
have attitudes that didn't match with their age.
In the end, it was the same with Vale with Brad Pitt naked than boys buying magazines with people fucking and girls showing their tits and everything.
It was a common thing. It was the time before internet.
Let's see how they're learning about sex now and from what age.
At least, we were at an age where we knew how to write "haha" and were free to go to the store and buy.
But I wonder today, at which age are they beginning to watch porn and explicit sex.
We are being hypersexualized.
I believe in the United States, we learnt about sex through our friends.
And porn too.
I'm not the host, but Zane, if I'm not wrong, is in "da house". Nice to meet you.
Hey Zane! Welcome! We have another American from Colorado, who lives in the UK, joining us into the conversation.
Another question was about being brave enough to flirt. If you go out and like someone in a sexual way, would you "attack"?
And everyone said "yes" but American women.
The average said "no". They felt shy about it.
Men also added that they like "to hunt". Same thing with Spanish women: they like to hunt.
While American women prefer to be hunted. They like better to be "attacked" as I said.
And when asked if they care if the other person can already be in a relationship, Spaniards generally don't care, neither men or women;
American women do care and American men half and half. It depends, the lady must be really hot, give or take.
Asking them how do they flirt: Americans, neither men or women, like to talk.
Men also buy them drinks. While in Spain is more about the game of looking, and then they get close and dance with that person.
Obviously, it's a cultural thing: in the US, they don't dance. In Spain, that's what we do, and that makes body expression easier.
I personally don't understand why anyone will want a date with a woman since it's so dangerous today.
It is dangerous because many people from the #MeToo movement file fake complains.
I don't flirt with many people. I do it just when I feel comfortable with them.
I flirted with my girlfriend many times.
But, in general, as a human being, I don't like to flirt. Anyway, you're right, men like to flirt with women but not the opposite in the US.
Here I think it depends on the personality: there's men who like to hunt, there's women who like to hunt.
And there's men who like to be hunted and women who only want to be hunted.
Anything is possible because we don't follow a unique rule in Spanish culture.
And what Tyler said about the #MeToo movement is really important.
It hasn't affected directly into the way the Spaniards act but, of course, men more than women,
are beginning to be more careful when they are flirting and are concerned about some kind of lasting consequences.
And here comes the issue:
I would like to point out that there's studies that affirm that from here to 20 years, we will not have any more sexual relationships.
meaning sex with other people.
We'll have sex with dolls, robots, machines, dildos or whatever, but not with other people to
avoid the emotional part or the potential difficulties which a relationship may bring.
Do you understand?
Yeah, well.
To me, the #MeToo movement is messing up everything.
To me, they're just weak women.
I've been in a club, a man had touch me inappropriately and I punched him in the face.
And that's the end of the problem.
At the same time, I've been with girlfriends touching men inappropriately and men have reacted consequently.
I mean... we all know how to defend ourselves.
#MeToo is a weak people movement.
And I hope that a future like that never happens because I like sex.
Healthy people like sex.
Sick people have an issue with sex and that's why they're trying to mess it up.
Also, I, as a Spaniard living in New York, I can compare.
I mean, here I'm afraid to flirt with a guy.
He is going to think the worse about me.
In Spain, either you attack a guy, or he attacks you.
Here I don't feel comfortable attacking.
Just the fact that I'm an extrovert makes them confused already.
At the same time, I think American men fear me too because when I go out, I dance, which American girls don't.
So, they look at me, guys look at me a lot.
I can tell they want me, but they're afraid to approach me.
They're afraid of me.
That must be part of the differences between Anglo-Saxon and Mediterranean culture.
Because of the weather and other things, there's many differences.
We spoke about it before.
Being extrovert, even inside Spain isn't the same north and south, west or east.
It depends on your attitude.
You'll be welcomed as a whore, as a cool or as a wanted girl. It really depends.
I like that you pointed out about a guy coming and touching my butt, but when it comes to girls touching a guy's butt: what happens?
The guy should step up and say:
"What the fuck are you doing? Respect me! You're objectifying me!".
In the end, nobody should cross some lines because it intimidates the person.
We must realize when we're getting too far.
I liked that point about men can be touched cause that is not a sexual aggression: excuse me, miss, but no.
That's also a sexual aggression: hold your hands.
I would like to speak more about the #MeToo movement because I believe it's a negative force.
For example, with case of a famous actor here, in the United States, his name is Vic Mignogna.
He's a famous actor for his roles in anime, and recently had many fake claims against him.
He is just a kind man that likes to hug his fans.
And many women believe he isn't innocent because he has many hugs for them.
And it's crazy that so many women in this part of the world want false reports against men as a weapon.
When I asked what do you care more about the body? Which part gets more attention from you?
American men care more about the whole body and face, focusing more in the butt
while Spanish men care not only about the whole body but also the look, the way it looks, focusing more on tits.
Speaking about women, American women care more about the whole body and face as American men do, but
they like men pretty fit.
However, Spanish women care more about sensuality.
They said men can be fat, slim, tall or short but very sensual, and care more about eyes and physical strength
not gym fit but strong enough to hold themselves up.
I think you just hit the mark with Spanish clichés.
We don't feel attracted by an iconic or canon perfect Apollonian man, with some kind of graceful features,
We care about the whole thing the most: if he has a beautiful voice, a magnetic look, his attitude, if he cares about his physic,
his corporal odor, if he has any social skills -not an oaf that can't do anything- and is decisive.
To me that is super sexy in a man: to be able to solve any issue, having a reaction capacity.
I find it linked to masculinity and to a macho
meaning he can be a good lover: if he is decisive, capable of solving any issue and to learn.
Automatically he will be a good lover; and if we go to the biological side, he would automatically be a good father to have children with.
So, yes. We don't care about the physical that much but everything together.
Although I love the physical things as the butt, tits and things like that from a woman,
But what's more important for me is the person and of course, her points of view.
If a person is a good or a bad. Things like that are more important for me for a date.
Obviously, even if she looks super attractive, it is more important the way she thinks and if she is kind.
I agree with Tyler, but I believe there's two forms of attraction: the romantic one and the physical one.
The physical one, of course men care about butt and tits, and for the American, I think they like both.
But, to me, I'm more concern about the romantic one. It is different. Let me explain myself. One minute.
Either with strangers or with people that I don't really know, I care more about the physical: "you're so pretty".
But people that I'm related to, I care more about their ideas, their morals, their virtues.
Their good things as human being. Not the physical. The physical matters too, but their ideas are more important.
Another question was if they like better sex in private or public spaces, what place, and which positions.
In general, they all agree about preferring sex in private spaces, as the majority likes better to do it at home.
And, when it comes to positions, American guys like the reverse cowgirl the most, the girl is on top but backwards,
while American girls like that position but facing them, which I found it more romantic, isn't it?
On the other hand, when it comes to Spanish men, they love to switch to different positions a lot and love it on top of a laundry machine
and when it comes to Spanish women, I think they kind of agree with men because they love the position called "the iron chef",
where the girl is on top of something high and the guy is standing up in front of her.
And also, they said that depending of the size of the guy's penis, they look for different positions which makes easier for women to have an orgasm.
I want to point out that it was harder to speak about all of this with American men and women.
It was much easier with Spaniards.
American men laughed and are kind of shy.
American women are closed, they don't talk.
When it comes down to Spaniards, they talk naturally about it, giving many explanations.
Maybe that's why the test's results for Americans seems to be emptier and tamer, while Spaniards look fuller.
We are back into the lack of sexual education in the United States versus the access of sexual education in Spain.
The laundry thing sounded pretty patriarchy. I'm kidding.
I can talk about myself or girlfriends who I've have talked about sex, and we don't have any specific position:
Doggy style, oral sex.
I mean, not the Kamasutra.
I think that works better: what people like the most is the sexual atmosphere, sexual attraction, and the first conclusion.
Then it goes to the sex drive and its show, which is the sex act.
I'm not a sexologist but I'm acting as I am.
I mean, everything is really easy, at least under my point of view.
Talking about the penis size.
Look, I don't think it matters meaning like a big or fat one would make a woman have an orgasm for sure.
The perfect size for the penis is the size that match completely with the size of the inside of the vagina and vice versa.
That's one point.
Another interesting one that I want to comment, and it is something that I've been thinking for a while, and it is pretty unusual:
everybody thinks they know how to do oral sex.
And people are beginning to speak up, saying that girls don't know how to do a blowjob properly while guys don't know how to lick it.
So, we all should think about it cause maybe we think we are lovers, the best fellators and pussy eaters,
and maybe we're not.
I believe we didn't learn much about sex at school due to the Republicans at the White House throughout our country.
Obviously, not all Republicans are like that, but some of the Republicans in our country are bad.
For example, in some states in our country we have many laws like "absence only".
I don't know the word. But because of things like absence only, we don't have that much sex education.
Anyway, when Spanish women were talking about the penis size, they didn't mean that they care if it ́s large or short.
They meant: "if the penis is small, on these positions I feel it better, and if it's too big, on these positions he can't put it all inside".
Trying to avoid getting hurt.
Actually, many say men with smaller penises are usually best lovers; it seems that they try to compensate the size by being "players".
People say size doesn't matter but, in the end, everybody wants to have a black one.
This was a moment of awkward silence! I'm holding my laugher right now.
You're the fucking boss!
And Tyler is "Breaking Spaniard".
Well, about what Kristo was saying previously. Indeed, they're important.
All of them agree. Americans like it longer, Spaniards think it depends on the situation.
It doesn't matter for either men or women.
They said that they speak openly about sex which seems strange to me because while I was making this test,
it was easy with Spaniards but I had a hard time with Americans,
even when most of them were my own friends.
I had to make them get drunk to speak.
Anyway, yeah, in general all agree that they like "to eat" the other person. I mean, eat his penis or her vagina: suck his dick or eat her pussy, as we say.
All agree, guys or girls, that yeah, they like it and it is a very good thing to do.
Also, they all agree that they like to do it to their partner to see how he/she gets excited.
I believe there's been a generation change.
I believe that porn has helped a lot.
Actors like Nacho Vidal who had put the side of his genitals
well, he still uses it hard, with his 10 inch.
They're also using techniques like eating a pussy or similar, giving pleasure, exciting the woman, making her have an orgasm.
That has been a late time phenomenon. And it's also related to age.
17 or 18 year old kids are not that pleasant, acting as little dogs, being more impulsive, full of testosterone but with no experience, looking for themselves, for their only satisfaction.
But, as they become men, they also become more generous on sex, knowing more about it, so then they not only find excitation in getting pleasure but in giving it too.
To see the other person getting excited because of you. I think on this point the porn, the change in porn, has helped.
Together with the time and experience, people, mostly male, care more about giving pleasure to their partners.
Speaking about pornography, I've saw many articles from the UK, and writers say that there's some ways of porn that are not good in there.
Also in Florida state, you can't watch porn on your phone because of a new law that doesn't allow many porn acts if you don't have money on your phone.
Okay. Kristo had to leave. She has an emergency with her daughter who is sick.
So, it is just us now. I didn't know porn was forbidden in Florida if you don't pay for it.
We had that in Spain, back then, when many different TV channels were beginning but because you had to pay for the channel, not because it was forbidden.
And, of course, just a little amount of people did want to pay for TV back then, when it was beginning.
Anyway, our cinema was full of erotic movies. A lot of erotic movies. They used to be marked with 2 diamonds, I mean: they had two diamonds in a corner, and it meant that the content was going to be pretty sexual.
We also spoke about the most erogenous places of the body.
Here men said penis and testicles while Spanish men said yes, the penis but also the neck, the ears.
While for women, American men said back and neck while Spanish men said that yes, the back, but also the inside part of the thigh meaning:
he gets close to my vagina but doesn't reach it.
The most erotic place for me would be... I don't know...
would be the ass. Perhaps the ass.
Each person in United States is different but, to me, It's personal but I prefer kisses on my neck.
Personally, on my tattoos I have. I think after I had them done, the skin in there is more sensitive. The most, the one I have on my back. Another one on my side.
Yes, I think my tattoos are my most sensitive parts.
I was asking too, and this is the end I believe, about masturbation.
American guys masturbate as an average every other day while Spaniards two to three times per week.
I believe is like every other day too. It depends also in the age range. When they're younger, they do it daily. They're going to do it less often as they get older.
On the other hand, American women
said they do it once per week, while some admitted doing it more often. And Spanish women every other day too. You know.
All of them use their imagination and porn, except for the American girls. American girls say they don't watch porn.
Spanish girls, yes. By the way, many Spanish girls use toys to masturbate themselves.
I believe many American women use their imagination because there's many things that you can imagine in your mind that porn doesn't show.
That's why books like 50 Shades of Grey are so popular in here, because many people use their imagination.
It is more creative than watching porn in the computer.
Yeah. I actually made a study about it too. 50 Shades of Grey.
It was a best seller in English speaking countries.
It sold more books than Harry Potter or Da Vinci's Code.
Also, theater screenings broke all the records, with an 82% of female audience.
Billing millions: it was savage!
While, the same movie or book in Spain didn't earn shit.
I think that says a lot about sexual frustration of women here or there.
Actually, I asked women about their orgasm, if they really had them while having sex, and the majority of Spanish girls have had them,
pointing out that with some sexual partners yes, but with some others no.
While American women were more about pretending to have orgasms. They feel shy to speak about it, so they pretend more.
One more time, this bring us into sexual education.
Of course, women orgasm is harder to reach, so they need to trust more in themselves, somebody that explain them how to explore themselves, how to know themselves.
And assume that sex is a two people thing, it needs to be talk.
This bring me to another difference that I found what is that Spaniard women are more into having sex meaning only sex: a night for fun and that's it.
Actually, we have the concept of "fuck buddies"
who is a "friend" to fuck and nothing else.
While Americans were looking more for a relation. They could have just one night of sex, but the majority of them stayed expecting him to call them again.
I wonder how Latino women are. My girlfriend is from Venezuela.
I believe many Americans don't have many orgasm because of the penis that men have.
I'm not kidding. Back then, a man that is very famous for his products like Corn Flakes, Frosted Flakes
things like that.
His name is Kellogg, and he had a campaign against penises that weren't circumcised. And that's why many women don't have orgasm.
So, you think that a penis circumcised doesn't work in bed?
I've never been with a man with a circumcised penis. Ever.
And neither have thought about it.
It is possible to have an orgasm for a man with a full penis. It is possible too, at least in the data
that men with a no full penis have less orgasms than those with a full penis.
I've read studies which stated that circumcised men indeed don't feel it the same way.
At the same time, that's why the defend that they can stay longer during the sexual act.
I can't tell you by my own experience. But I know there's techniques and tricks to make a none circumcised man stay longer too.
Anyway, you can always fuck once, and do it again. You know?
If the man finishes too soon, you can begin again. It isn't a big issue.
I don't know. I can't really have an opinion because I haven't had both experiences to compare each thing.
Well, Zane had to leave too. He can't be here any longer. So, now it is between Tyler and me.
Tyler say the truth, which women are more attractive to you: Spanish or American?
Obviously Spanish women are the most attractive women to me.
Obviously not all American women are ugly, but I do believe Spaniards and European people are more attractive than people in here.
Okay. We can still be friends.
This is our conversation we have here. I have many social media:
Facebook and Twitter. It's called TylerPreston20.
Unfortunately, Zane and Kristo are not here but you can find their social media in the description. And until next time. Bye guys!
Thank you so much. It was a pleasure... quite literally. I'm on Twitter: @xiomirb. Xiomi with an "x".
He's our friend, he's Tyler!
Your best black friend, so he's the best!
I wouldn't trade him for anyone because black friends are an exception.
He smiles like Richard Pryor so sit down.
He's our friend!
He's Tyler!
He's our friend!
He's Tyler!
He's our friend Tyler, he's Tyler!
English Translation: Xiomara Ramirez Editor:TylerPreston20
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