Tired of Being a Negativity Sponge 12 Ways to Prevent Energy Infiltration and Reclaim
Your Energy
by Cristina Valenzuela
Do you ever find yourself taking on the negative energy of others?
If so, you are not alone.
Most of us come in contact with numerous people every day � who bring us down.
We all feel it.
We know when we are with someone who is high-spirited and happy or someone who is low and unhappy,
but why is it so easy for others to affect us in negative ways?
Some of us cannot even go into supermarkets without taking on the woes of everyone in
the store.
In order to shield ourselves from negative energy, we must first understand how our energy
is infiltrated by others.
I worked as a crisis counselor at a well-known crisis center in New York for about seven
years.
I quickly figured out that if I was going to be successful at helping people, I couldn�t
take on any negative energy.
Because I uncovered the secret to keeping my energy clean and clear, I was able to assist
thousands of people in dire need without once being adversely affected, and in fact, I consistently
felt energized and fulfilled.
If I can do it, anyone can.
Energy Infiltration Whenever you encounter someone, whether in
the morning rush to the bathroom or over the conference table, an exchange of energy is
at play.
There is your energy and there is the other person�s energy.
At some point in space the energies meet.
If you could be a fly on the wall, you would witness an interesting dance of vibration
� with the strongest energy leading the dance.
This means that if you are not centered in your energy field, your energy could be infiltrated
and influenced by that of your friend, spouse, child, friend, parent or perhaps a stranger.
So even if you are having a good day and you meet someone who is spewing their bad-day-energy
onto you, your good day will likely turn bad.
You have been hit by Energy Infiltration.
Don�t Use Negative Emotions as Tools for Connection
It�s natural to want to connect with others, but we often do this unconsciously by matching
emotions.
In other words, if your friend is sad, you become sad in order to connect with her.
Or, if your partner is annoyed at something, you mirror that annoyance in order to get
on the same wave length.
The thing is, every time we use negative emotions as tools for connection, we compromise our
own energy, and even if we want to help our friend, spouse, child or co-worker, we cannot
offer effective support or guidance at the low emotional level of the problem.
How can you help anyone if you are suffering with them?
If your friend is depressed, you don�t need to become depressed in order to connect with
him.
It is possible to offer compassion and understanding without compromising your energy.
If you can maintain a higher level of emotional vibration, you can be of greater service,
simply by creating a safe space for your friend to express his feelings without bringing you
down.
Let Go of Responsibility The quickest way to be affected by another�s
negative energy is to feel responsible for them or their experience.
Every time you feel responsible for another, you take on the responsibility as if it belongs
to you, and your body, mind and spirit responds as if you really are responsible and you must
fix the problem.
In other words, you take on worry, stress and pressure that belongs to someone else.
Feeling responsible for another is like accepting their baggage as your own; hence, walking
around with their weight on your shoulders.
How many people can you do this for without getting overwhelmed or even sick?
Sometimes our illnesses are the result of carrying problems that aren�t even ours.
How much of what you carry doesn�t even belong to you?
Really think about this.
No matter how much you care about someone, you are not responsible for them or their
issues.
You are responsible for you and your experience of them, but not for them.
Don�t think that you can help someone by taking on their stuff as your own.
The best help you can ever provide is through keeping your vibe high and inviting others
up to meet you.
They may or may not come up, but that is also not your responsibility.
Once you release responsibility, you can actually show up in a more responsive way and possibly
be of service, instead of part of the problem.
Stop Playing Judge The act of judging immediately connects us
to the source of our judgement.
This means that if the other person�s emotional vibe is low, your vibe will quickly match.
Thereby compromising your energy in exchange for judgment.
As soon as you judge someone�s experience, even if it is silently to yourself, you invite
the energy of their experience into your own energy field.
Because the mind does not know the difference between real and imagined, judging something
about another opens you up to taking on the energy of whatever you are judging, as if
it is happening to you.
This includes gossip.
When we allow everyone their own experiences, we don�t take on their energy or the energy
of their issues.
If it is not about you, keep out.
Your mental interference in someone else�s life is not worth the risk to your energy.
Drop the Sympathy The moment you sympathize with someone, you
energetically take on the symptoms of the person you are feeling sorry for.
Yes, sympathy is when you feel sorry for someone.
This means that you can catch a cold over the phone or feel pain in your body when you
experience sympathy for another.
Feeling sorry for someone is actually judging their experience � so when you feel sorry
for someone, you lower your vibe to match theirs � taking on all that negative energy.
When you feel sorry for another, you are actually imagining that they are stuck in their predicament
and they are powerless to heal, change or consciously create a new reality.
How does it help anyone when you are imagining the worst?
You cannot feel sorry for someone and imagine them empowered at the same time.
When you imagine others empowered, you also empower yourself and raise your own vibration.
The evolution of sympathy is compassion.
Compassion allows you to maintain a space of love and understanding for others without
compromising your energy in any way.
Can you love someone and allow their experience without feeling sorry for them?
Can you trust that their experience is somehow perfect for growth, evolution and awakening?
Don�t Give Anyone Power Over You We tend to allow our energy to be influenced
by those who appear to have power over us: parents, teachers, bosses, authority figures,
etcetera.
If someone in authority is having a bad day, and spews it on us, we don�t hesitate to
accept it, or maybe we even allow these people to dictate how we feel about ourselves
When you remember that everyone is a reflection of your own consciousness, it is easy to see
that no one ever has power over you.
They only have the power that you give to them through your thoughts beliefs and actions.
The more you own your power, the more control you will have over your vibration � and
not take on energy that does not belong to you.
Let Go of Thinking That You Know Better
When we think that we know better and we try to change others, we instantly allow their
energy to infiltrate ours.
If you don�t want anyone to affect your energy, then it is important to allow everyone
their own experiences and their own choices.
Don�t even have opinions about their opinions.
In trying to convince someone of your �know-how,�� you are likely to compromise your own energy.
Remember how you feel is your most important asset � sacrifice it for nothing and no
one.
Stop Reacting to Others Are there people in your life who attempt
to get their energy through drama?
In other words, they try to invoke negative emotional responses from you, in order to
�get energy.�� Maybe you are even doing this unconsciously to others?
The moment you react, you give your power away and you also accept the negative energy
of the person causing you to react.
In order to be angry, resentful, jealous, etcetera, you must lower your vibration, and
as soon as you are an emotional match to the other person, their energy infiltrates yours.
If you want to own your energy and stay positive, it is just not worth reacting.
The cost is too great.
This doesn�t mean that you cannot speak your truth and set boundaries in a way that
supports you and the relationship.
This can be done from a space of clarity and compassion.
Don�t Take Sides
Others may want to use your energy to support their cause, but if it is not about you, don�t
make it about you.
Allowing yourself to get in the middle of another�s squabble or cause, when you know
it doesn�t concern you, is basically a waste of your valuable energy.
You can support others without getting in the middle, and without allowing your energy
to be poisoned by another�s issues.
Do Not Accept Blame Even if someone blames you or is angry at
you, you don�t need to take on their energy.
My five year old grandson spilled his ice cream in the car and blamed me because I hit
a bump in the road.
We talked about him blaming me so that he could feel better about the loss of the ice
cream, but he really felt worse.
People blame us all the time for things that are out of our control.
Just because someone blames you, doesn�t mean you have to take it on.
If you are responsible, be responsible and rectify the situation, but don�t allow yourself
to be someone else�s scape-goat.
You do not even need to react to the blame � just let it pass.
Say �No�� to People Pleasing If you are a people pleaser, you are likely
very good at giving your energy away and therefore being affected by other�s energy.
Because people pleasers put others before themselves, they are not responsible with
their energy and therefore they become energy sponges for everyone whom they are trying
to please.
It is not your job to please the world.
In fact, you would do much better at pleasing others if you first pleased yourself, putting
your own needs and wants in first place.
It is okay to say, �No�� and set boundaries that create a safe haven for you to be responsible
for your own energy.
11.
Stop Believing Others Beliefs
When two people meet, the one with the stronger beliefs about life often dominates the energetic
dance, but only if you are not grounded in your own beliefs.
You may consider various beliefs presented by others, but don�t be bullied by someone
who thinks that they know best.
Sometimes others will even think that they know what is best for us and they try to infringe
their beliefs upon us in the name of caring, but only you know what is best for you.
Follow your own inner guidance.
Mind Your Own Business This might be a hard one, but it is none of
your business what other people think about you.
You cannot please all the people all the time, but it is also not your job to please anyone.
It only matters what you think, and feel, about you.
As long as you try to control other people�s thoughts and feelings about you, you subject
yourself to their energy.
It�s like you are telepathically saying, �Please tell me how I should feel about
myself today.�� When you no longer have interest in what the world thinks about you,
something truly amazing happens.
Your confidence soars and you become super attractive � energetically and even physically.
As a result, others will actually think more highly of you, but you won�t care, and that
is the point!
Being Responsible With Your Energy Most people are not responsible with their
energy, but this doesn�t give you permission to be irresponsible with yours.
This means being consciously responsible for the energy that you receive and the energy
that you project.
Once you are completely responsible with your own energy, it doesn�t matter if someone
is regurgitating their energy onto you � you won�t take it.
Ironically, it will also happen a great deal less.
If you do take on another�s energy, it is important to remember that once you take it
on, it becomes your energy � not theirs.
If this is the case, notice in what of the 12 ways above you have allowed your energy
to be infiltrated.
Take responsibility for it.
No one can force you to take their energy.
As long as you blame another, you have no power to release it � thereby giving even
more of your energy away.
Over time, you can train your energy upward to a threshold where others cannot bring you
down.
It might take some conscious effort to get there but once you do, life flows with ease
and grace and you become a beacon of love and light for others.
Here�s how you can be even more responsible with your energy:
Own Your Energy It is important to know how you feel prior
to all interactions, so if there is any change in how you are feeling, you can identify it,
and quickly release it by saying, �This is not mine � I release it.��
See the Innocence in Everyone When you look deep, we are all really innocent.
Seeing everyone as innocent and doing the best they can will allow you to stay positive,
and not take on the negative energies of others.
Get the Happy-People High When you do come in contact with happy or
high energy people, join the party.
Accept the gift of positive energy � just be careful not to depend on others to feel
good.
Practice Letting Go Living in a state of letting go allows you
to keep your energy clean and clear.
When you let go, negative energy cannot stick to you.
Don�t Play Catch Just because someone throws you a dirty rag,
doesn�t mean you have to catch it � let it go, and it cannot affect you.
Look for the Beauty We tend to look for what is wrong in others
� but, instead look for the beauty, and you will align with higher and higher aspects
of others.
People will feel your love and respond in turn, raising your vibration and theirs.
Be Kind to Yourself The world is always reflecting the feelings
and beliefs that we have towards ourselves.
If you want others to address you more positively, you must also commit to doing this for yourself.
Set Boundaries It is okay to let people know how to treat
you and even how to speak with you.
Don�t be afraid to set boundaries, such as: no gossiping, no judgement, no complaining.
You might say something like, �You probably didn�t know this, but I am making how I
feel the most important part of everyday, so I am no longer taking part in gossip or
anything that feels judgmental toward me or anyone else.�� You might add, �Would
you like to join me?��
Share Positive Energy If you are feeling good, show it.
Smile, be generous and give compliments.
Live out loud.
Remember, the stronger vibration dominates all personal encounters.
When you out-warded share positive energy, you won�t be affected by lower vibes and
those around you will actually begin to feel better.
This is how you make a difference every day!
Project Energy Instead of surrounding yourself with a protective
energy shield, imagine Divine Energy flowing into you and overflowing from you � creating
an aura of light and love all around you.
Allow this powerful energy to resonate from you and affect everyone you meet.
Trust Your Intuition Your intuition is a superior inner guidance
system and will always show you the way.
When you don�t listen to your self and you put the desires of others first, you compromise
your energy and you allow the energy of others to affect you.
Every time you trust your inner guidance and take action accordingly, you strengthen your
ability to protect your personal energy, and therefore you naturally keep-out negative
energy.
Final Thoughts When you ultimately reach a point where you
don�t take on the energy of others, you are able to connect and respond from a higher
level, where it is possible to feel what someone is feeling without acquiring their pains and
woes.
This is the Divine Experience of Compassion.
From this pristine space, you can give love without compromising or sacrificing yourself
in any way.
Instead of feeling drained, you feel powerfully energized and have an abundance of positive
and powerful energy to offer and share.
It is through this state of Higher Love, that you are truly of service
to the world.
Victory of the Light!
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